I've been lurking at the forum for a while and I decided to register and write my prensentation.
Since I hit puberty and started having interest in sexuality, I always knew I had a small penis. I’m 4 inches long and 5,5 girth (yeah more girth than lenght how weird is that lol). This fact always annoyed me and limited my life. It also started quite early. When I was around 12, I wanted to be part of those nights when Jake’s parents(fictionnal name) went out and my friends would all gather there to watch their porn movies and jerk off together, but I was too shy due to my size. I didnt want them to see how small my dick was. I was affraid they would laught at me. I also avoid any kind of gym shower where I cant have a private booth for that same reason. When I was having sex with my ex girlfriend she once told me : "come on! ram me with your little dick!". She was not beeing mean at all ... she was just encouraging me to fuck her harder in the heat of the moment. She was also the kind of girl to have an orgasm every 5 minutes so even if that comment really sucked, It wasnt really hurt. I was just annoyed me.
So I guess to sum it up, the cons of having a small penis was some minor annoying situations or minor limitations and I could perfectly live with that. Well, thats what I though until recently! I have a fuck buddy and we are really honest with each other about every subject, including other sexual partners. When we sleep with other people, we always talk about it and I have to admit, I like hearing her sexual escapades with other men.
One day we were chatting on msn and she says : I met a guy last night.
Me : Did you bring him home?
Her : Yes.
Me : Was it good?
Her : It was amazing!
Me : Oh yeah? What was so special with him? (This was not me beeing jealous, this was me beeing turned on and wanting to hear the sex story)
Her : Well I cant tell you that…
Me beeing stupid : Sure you can!
Her : I’d rather not ….
Me beeing even more stupid : Come on! Spit it out! We agreed we would be honest with each other about that … and you know I love hearing about you and other men
So here she goes : Well, he had an enormous dick !(both long and thick as I discovered latter) I could feel every shot he gave me. It was so good!
Me : Well ok anyway I gotta go see ya.
As you probably guessed, I didnt have to go. I was just shocked, broken. I felt sick in my stomach. This is not a figure of speech, I felt physically sick. This was like a bullet right through my hearth. My manhood was destroyed in a few seconds. I had trouble sleeping the next 3 or 4 days and I had hanger episodes.
When I finally see her back on msn, I told her how I felt about what she said. She said she was sorry for making me feel like that. She also said the truth was she didnt liked to be fucked by that guy because of his dick, but because there was some kind of sexual/erotic/sensual connection between them that was missing between us. From a woman perspective, she though I would take that harder than the big dick factor(seriously chicks say we dont get them, but they dont get us either!). The worst is she always used to tell me I had a perfect dick because according to her, I was pretty large but not too long and I can maintain a rock hard erection for a really long time without cumming. Now she comes up with this wtf???
Anyways we talked about it and I finally worked it out, but since that moment I began to notice every subtle things concerning penis size I was missing before. Some examples are small/big dick jokes, insunuation about why big dicks are better in TV shows, movies, etc. I also started to focus on the female friends I had over the last 8 years or so who I knew loved big dicks, even though they probably are a minority. This constant thinking about my « handicap » gave me somme pretty dark days.
Then I tried to find serious studies on the web concerning women’s preference about size. The most reliable I found said that the majority of women cared more about girth than lenght. Well thats nice! I’m pretty lucky with that stat! But then again, what does « cared more about girth» mean? Does it mean they dont care about the lenght as long as its thick? I mean 4 inches is pretty short! 98% of the men have a longer dick than mine. Is that enough? Some sexual positions give me no pleasure due to my shortness and some I cant even do.
Also, even if I’m not homo or even bisexual, I always found there was something hot about big dicks. Something majestic, manly! I always loved to see big dicks penetrate pussies or beeing sucked by hot chicks.
I made some more reseach and I discovered PE! I was skeptical at first and I let it go for a few months. Last week I decided read a little more about it and it started to make sense to me so I decided to give it a shot. I’m still not sure it will work but hey! If done safely I got nothing to lose! So here I am with my 4x5,5 dick. I’ll read more about PE before starting and probably ask a few questions because even though my dick is small, it’s the only one I’ve got and I dont want to break it lol! I’m still not sure about the size I want to be. I’d say about 6-7 NBPEL and 6,5-7 girth. Maybe I’ll aim for 8 NBPEL but according to what I read, I’ll have plenty of time to make up my mind before I make it there lol!
Peace out!
Four to Seven
