(Guys) Ever felt like this?

[Hanma]

Like your girlfriend / wife / partner was too good for you?

If you have, you know how sad it can make you feel about yourself, it could hinder your progress in your relationship, or hurt your self esteem.

It's the same thing with me and her.

She's smart, learning several languages, attractive, photogenic, good at singing, good at playing instruments, social, makes the most out of life, makes people happy and people (and lots of boys) love her back - she's plain amazing.

I on the other hand, have nothing that could match up to her. I was good at drawing and some sports, but it's been years since I've done anything. I can't sing, my photos suck, I'm average looking, not so good at socialising, got no real hobbies ... I'm just a plain average joe.
I don't know why she loves me so much still, seeing we live far away and I can only comfort her with words.

Have any of you ever had this? If so, how did you get out of this predicament?
Any tips would be nice.

It's really hurting my self worth, you know.

Guys and girls and welcome to post their opinions!

 

[closed149]

She's with you for a reason, man. Realize that if she didn't find you attractive and interesting she wouldn't be with you!

No reason to think poorly of yourself; be all that you can be for you and her!

 

[Hanma]

I try. But I feel like I can never stand on equal grounds with her.

 

[closed149]

She is not better than you, just as you and I are not better than anyone else.

The important thing to do is make the most out of your life that you possibly can, because you only get this one. Find something you love and do it! It doesn't matter what it is -- art, music, dance, business, science, exercise, PE -- anything!

You have the opportunity to make out of your life whatever you want, you are your own man.

 

[Hanma]

Thanks ... I'll try that out.

 

[TTBB]

i know you are just wanting guys feedback on this
i just wanted to say that i know the feeling...when i really like someone and if i feel they are out of my league, i tend to trip myself up in the same way..it comes down to the fact i don't think i am worthy..its not about the other person...its about fear of failing and rejection

 

[Hanma]

i know you are just wanting guys feedback on this
i just wanted to say that i know the feeling...when i really like someone and if i feel they are out of my league, i tend to trip myself up in the same way..it comes down to the fact i don't think i am worthy..its not about the other person...its about fear of failing and rejection

('ll edit the title, to make it fair =])

And yes that's the thing, I don't want to disappoint her, I don't want to let her down. I want to be the best guy she's had and she actually believes that will happen.

So that's the thing ... I just want to seem worthy of her.

 

[TTBB]

i do understand completely
you have to believe that she sees more in you then you do.. you have to believe that she embraces your imperfections and flaws just as you do hers..
how long have you been with her?

 

[NP97]

Try not to keep feeling that way. It leads to insecurites about yourself... which is a MAJOR turn off to women.
I once asked a girl why she was with me. And followed up with why she would ever be with me when she could be with someone better (more money, better looking, anything). Even followed that up with she DESERVES better than me.
She said because she loved ME, but I just couldn't believe that. I was going through a very rough patch of my life at that point (no school, no job, bills sky high, etc).
Remember, you don't pick who you fall in love with. Same goes for women.

 

[phil88]

I could easily be way off base here. I have never dealt with a long distance relationship, but maybe do you think you feel this way because your afraid of her finding someone "better" due to the fact that you guys are separated through distance? If so all I can say is that is perfectly rational. Also do you think maybe it could be really you probably just miss her and are afraid of losing her and your simply going over the reasons you think she might have for doing so? That would be a perfectly normal and understandable response and you should not feel bad about it all. I do not see how anyone would react any differently if they were truly capable of caring about someone.

I suggest try concentrating on the joy you will feel at seeing her again. Make it something special. Also if you guys are apart now is the perfect time to do some self improvement. You can use what your feeling as motivation. By the time you guys are reunited you could have that crazy 6-pack, some extra girth, or have a new talent to show off.

 

[TTBB]

Where did it say long distance .. did i miss something?

 

[phil88]

I don't know why she loves me so much still, seeing we live far away and I can only comfort her with words.

I dont know if this means its long distance but that is the impression I was given.

 

[TTBB]

thanks.. my mind didn't process that part .
figured it was under my nose but i wasn't seeing it

 

[phil88]

no problem perfectly understandable, its late

 

[Knuckle Up]

thanks.. my mind didn't process that part .
figured it was under my nose but i wasn't seeing it

Yea my nose tends to get in the way of my eyes sometimes aswell... ; p.

To the t/s, you just really got to see it in a more simplier way. You just gotta better yourself. Look in the mirror, and ask yourself "If I was the opposite sex what would I like about myself?". Focus on the positive and make them stronger.

 

[Hanma]

i do understand completely
you have to believe that she sees more in you then you do.. you have to believe that she embraces your imperfections and flaws just as you do hers..
how long have you been with her?

Yes, she said something similar to that. She says I make her feel wonderful and loved, so I do my best to keep it that way.

Well, I met her when I was 15ish. We got on really well together and went on for a few months. Then she disappeared ... for a couple of years. Later found out she had been in an accident, had to go to several hospitals, get mental treatments - horrible sh*t. When she finally contacted me, she told me about these things, and I did my best to make her happy again. And that's where we started it again This was 4 months ago.

Try not to keep feeling that way. It leads to insecurites about yourself... which is a MAJOR turn off to women.
(...)
Remember, you don't pick who you fall in love with. Same goes for women.

Thanks, I agree with this.

I could easily be way off base here. I have never dealt with a long distance relationship, but maybe do you think you feel this way because your afraid of her finding someone "better" due to the fact that you guys are separated through distance?

Exactly. That and there are actually guys there who're better looking and good at other stuff.

Also do you think maybe it could be really you probably just miss her and are afraid of losing her and your simply going over the reasons you think she might have for doing so?

That would be correct. Those thoughts haunt me sometimes.

I suggest try concentrating on the joy you will feel at seeing her again. Make it something special. Also if you guys are apart now is the perfect time to do some self improvement. You can use what your feeling as motivation. By the time you guys are reunited you could have that crazy 6-pack, some extra girth, or have a new talent to show off.

Thank you for your wisdom, I will work on myself now.

 

[ridiculed]

I do all the time. It's gotten so bad that I never try anymore. I'm unemployed, don't have a car, have a bland personality and I have a small pennis. Fortunately I believe I only need one of these to succeed with hoes. Since I'm on this site, it's obvious which one I'm targeting.

 

[Batwoman]

Ridiculed, please don't be unnecessarily disrespectful to women. It doesn't do anyone (including yourself) any good. Work to improve yourself, but don't call us "hoes" just to make yourself feel better.

 

[Editor]

She's with you for a reason, man. Realize that if she didn't find you attractive and interesting she wouldn't be with you!

No reason to think poorly of yourself; be all that you can be for you and her!

+1 to this. Listen to this man. Don't think about it man.

 

[NP97]

I do all the time. It's gotten so bad that I never try anymore. I'm unemployed, don't have a car, have a bland personality and I have a small pennis. Fortunately I believe I only need one of these to succeed with hoes. Since I'm on this site, it's obvious which one I'm targeting.

Ever think that attitude may be why you haven't found anyone?