After my marriage, as a single guy I had a friend of mine ask me to sleep with his wife. He wanted us to both do it at the same time and because I was still going through post-divorce blues I was not jumping at the chance but finally one night we did all three mess around a bit.
I COMPLETELY understand the not wanting to swap. I know when I am completely in love and head over heels it is a sort of hot fantasy that I have a lot, but the reality would be something else. The only time I got into it awhile as I stated was when I was seeing a girl I was really into sexually, but knew I would never marry, etc. so felt okay about us swapping. I am glad I did as it was a turn on and fun, but mainly because of my distance emotionally. We'd meet couples at hotels or at their homes and it was just crazy fun. This one couple, the guy loved to just "give" us his girl to do whatever we wanted with while he watched, or sometimes left and let us "borrow her". Nutty times.
I had NO problem with the women I loved being with other women. I was on a business trip once when I was married and had my wife and girlfriend get it on while I could listen on the phone. My current girl, as I mentioned, had been through pretty much all the crazy experiences sexually you could imagine and the last five years pretty much put all her wild sexual side behind here (threesomes, anal sex, etc.) but since being with me she has reawakened some of that "giant" and now wants to find a girl again.
Her experience with the swapping was fun she said, but admitted she was also using it as a way out of her marriage at the time. She had lost a lot of respect for her husband for a couple reasons (cheating being one of them) and so after they got involved with a stripper, they found some "couples retreat" that she said "hey, lets do this so we can both get it on" and her husband was like: "okay", so the two of them for about 4 months had four or five couples they would regularly get together with and spend the whole night swapping. It was, she said, each combo going off somewhere and getting it on rather than 4 guys on a girl, etc., but she said it certainly served to slowly sever their relationship. But, she enjoyed it. The whole "prepping" with the women in the showers and getting high (ecstacy) was all part of the fun.
Her and I have talked extensively about it and I said that I admit I am not turned on by watching another guy with her in reality partly because of her past and how it helped to separate her relationship. I also tried it (with her and her husband) and did not really do a lot for me sexually. She understands and even respects that about me as her last husband was pretty much like "here you go guys, take her". I have several couple friends that LOVE swapping. The men love watching their wives with other men and visa versa but for me, watching the woman-to-woman is about my limit. I don't even care if I join in anymore. I have had quite a few FFM threesomes so know what it is about and am cool if it never happens again, but she does like the idea of wanting me to play around with the third as well, so if (more likely when) this happens, I will let you all know ;-)
She is a gorgeous girl and I don't mean in the way that every man should look at their girl but had been a model and actress for a number of years and just gets a lot of attention wherever she goes from men and women. She is all I ever need for sure but having her be the primary girl with a third coming in will be something I imagine.
