Female Sexual Anatomy Basics: AKA Where is the Clitoris?

female sexual anatomy

female sexual anatomyLet’s be honest guys, the female sexual anatomy is a weird (and awesome!) mystery. Male sexual anatomy is so much more straight forward (at least externally).  You have the penis and the testicles – maybe some foreskin. Everything’s just out there in front – easy to access – easy to see – usually easy to please.

But, women… we tuck our fun bits underneath. We have weird inner labia and outer labia, and that oh-so-elusive…

CLITORIS!

Even if you’ve had lots of sexual partners, that little nub of pleasure can be as hard to find sometimes as a unicorn in a field of 4-leaf clovers! So, let’s take a look at some basic outer female sexual anatomy, and specifically talk about the clitoris.

Female Sexual Anatomy Overview

Female sexual anatomy usually includes the vulva (the outer “fun parts”) and the reproductive system (the inner “working parts”). The inner working parts, like the ovaries, the Fallopian tubes, and more are all very important to sexual health, but in this post, let’s focus on the vulva.

The Vulva (and NO “Vulva” is not the fancy term for the Vagina)

First, let’s clear up one really common misconception. That whole outer female sex area down there… NOT the vagina. It’s actually called the vulva.

The vagina is the flattened tube that connects the outer world with the cervix, which leads to the uterus. So, when someone is talking about the vagina, they (shouldn’t) don’t mean the whole funland area down there – they (should be) are talking about specifically that tube inside the body.

OK, with that straightened out, let’s look at the parts of the vulva. (the outer sexual anatomy bits). The vulva includes:

    • Labia (Majora – outer lips & Minora – inner lips) –
      • The labia (lips) are the folds of skin that go around the vaginal opening. As the names imply – the inner lips (minora) are the folds closer to the opening inside the outer (majora) lips.
      • Labia are as different and unique as thumbprints. No two are alike. Some are plump and tight and short. Some are long and wrinkly.
      • Just like men typically have one testicle that hangs lower than the other – most women have one labia that hangs lower than the other.
      • Again, just like a man’s penis tissue coloration can vary significantly from man-to-man and can even be significantly different from the skin color on the rest of their body, the labia can be light pink to a dark brown. FUN FACT: The color of many women’s labia changes as they get older!
      • Like the skin of the testicles, the labia can be very sensitive. They typically swell (some women more than others) when sexually stimulated with increased blood flow.
      • Urban slang – fish lips, taco, bearded clam, and SO many more!
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    • Urethra Opening –
      • The tiny hole the woman urinates out of. It’s located toward the top of the vulva, right below the clit.
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    • .Vaginal Opening – 
      • The vaginal opening is located below the urethra opening. This is the gateway to fun town.
      • The vaginal opening, although an “opening”, is not naturally in an open state, because the vagina itself is a flattened tube to prevent entry of bacteria and unwanted objects.
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    • The Anus – 
      • Whether or not your partner considers this part of the female anatomy to be part of her “sexual” anatomy is up to her. Always discuss (and get approval) any anal activity with your partner before trying anything.
      • This opening to the rectum has a lot of very sensitive nerve endings in it. For this reason, many women and men alike get sexual pleasure when this area is stimulated.
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    • Mons Pubis – 
      • The mons pubis is the fleshy portion of skin above the vulva. It’s designed to cushion the pubic bone of the woman, so includes a fat pad that expands and contracts with overall bodyweight.
      • Men also have this same fat pad to cushion their pubic bone and, in fact, overweight men can see measurable increase in penis length (both flaccid and erect) simply by losing weight and decreasing this fat pad.
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    • Clitoris –
      • The clitoris is protected by a fold of skin, where the inner labia meet, known as the clitoral hood.
      • The tip of the clit is located at the top of the vulva, right where those labia minor come together.
      • Like penises, the tip of clitorises (clitori? – hmm… what is the plural) come in a lot of different sizes. Some are small, even smaller than the size of a pea. Some are rather large – like thumb size. All are beautiful!
      • The clit continues into the body and runs along both sides of the vagina (the canal we talked about earlier).
      • When turned on, the clitoris typically swells with blood – like a little mini penis.
      • FUN FACT: There are more nerve endings per square inch than any other part of the body in the clitoris. AND, it has no other purpose than to feel good! The ultimate hedonistic body part!

How Do You Find the Clitoris? And, Why is it So Elusive?

So, if this little tiny body part is so pleasurable why in the world is it so hard for men to find? You’d think God (or whatever method of creation you believe in) would’ve put a big arrow on this thing. TOUCH HERE! That way men would be able to find it easier and women would want to have sex more often, since 75% of women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm!

Read that again guys… 75% of women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm!

Needless to say – finding and successfully stimulating the clit should be PRIORITY #1 (or at least at the top of your sexual to do list). Check out these drawings below, to start to “see” where you should begin your clitoral treasure hunt.

where is the clitoris

vulva anatomy

Step-By-Step Instructions on Finding the Clit

  1. Have your partner lie down on their back.
  2. Gently separate the labia.
  3. Locate the vagina opening. If the vaginal opening were a 6 on the face of a clock, the clitoris is going to be at 12.
  4. Slowly move your hand up the vulva from the vaginal opening. Follow the inner lips up and where they meet – that’s the clitoral hood.
  5. Gently stimulate the clitoral hood. Circular motions are usually good. Start softly and increase intensity slowly. Tongue, fingers, nose, vibrator – whatever.
  6. If you’re not sure you’re in the right spot, make those circles wide by using the whole pad of your finger, rather than the tip – or the flat of your tongue, rather than the tip.
  7. Once stimulated, the clitoris will typically fill with blood and become more prominent. Some of them get pretty big; other stay small but are engorged. Even if you can’t see it (maybe the lights are off, or you’re not at the right viewing angle), you should be able to feel the clit once your partner is sexually excited.
  8. Back of the pressure and very gently rub your fingertip or tongue around the area until you feel the hard little excited nub and VOILA!
  9. Go get ’em! But, again, start softly and build pressure slowly.

If you’re looking for more information on the female body, be sure to check out the posts below. An educated lover is a better lover! 😀

A Little Bit About Female Anatomy: AKA How Big is the Vagina?

More About the Vagina

Where is the G-Spot?