Pranks on Roommate

RIB2211

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I hate pranks. I hate them a lot. I hate them so much that when someone gets me, I never even try to get them back so things don't escalate. I don't like people messing with my stuff, out of fear that they will break it. However, my one roommate won't stop, and this time he simply put a bike lock on my cabinet where I keep my food and refuses to unlock it. So now I'm pissed.

I have planned seven pranks, one for each day of the week. I will stop when he takes the lock off.

1. I did this one yesterday. I took all of his bar soap and covered it in a thick coat of clear nail polish. When he goes to shower, the soap will not lather up.

2. Did this prank this morning and it worked perfectly. I bought a giant bag of foil confetti, and I poured it into his car's AC vents (he leaves his truck unlocked like a dumbass). I set the AC to full blast so when he turns his car on, confetti will fly all over his truck.

3. Going to cut off about a half inch of his deorderant, and replace it with cream cheese.

4. Superglue his shampoo bottle shut.

5. Take his laptop and hide it in his closet. Leave a post-it note where it was, leading him on a scavenger hunt all the way around the house before finally leading him back to his closet.

6. If by this time he still has not taken the lock off, I'm taking about 10 Kraft cheese singles and putting them under his mattress.

7. Still not off my cabinet, I'm buying 4 three dollar alarm clocks from CVS and will set them to go off at 2 AM, 3 AM, 4 AM, and 5 AM.
 

irheretogrow

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Ow...I wouldn't wanna be your roommate xD
 

mistydawn

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I love It! I have never been a prankster. Never been a part of any. I only knew about two Army guys forced to room together. They did really awful things to each other. It was due to hate. Very funny stuff though.
 

Pegasus

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Why don't you just cut the lock off? This is what I have done in similar situations and they cry about the busted lock.
Failing that prawns (shrimp) in his truck.
 
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RIB2211

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So he texts me this morning and goes "Good job with the confetti! Prank war is on!"

I don't want a prank war. I hate pranks. I told him to take the bike lock off my cabinet and I would stop. He goes "Oh man, you're so scared of me!". Well this pissed me off. So I just installed a locking program on his computer that prohibits him from saving/opening files and running applications without the proper password. I left a note as his desktop background saying "When you're ready to use your computer, you must agree to remove the bike lock and leave me the fuck alone from now on".
 

Batwoman

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Time for a new roommate.
 

Crazy Doc

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Visine (the eye drops) is excellent for a prank. Squirt a bunch into his drink.... it's one of the worst laxatives you've ever seen-old bartender trick (for obnoxious customers). And it's tasteless in a drink.

You can also take all his furniture and nail it to the ceiling-so his whole room is upside down.

You can also fill the shower head with food coloring-this one only works if he gets in first, some don't.

While he's showering, you can sneak in and attach a coat hanger to the toilet flusher-holding it down, so it keeps flushing-he'll get scalded. Speaking of scalding-you can also turn off the pipe to the cold on the shower-50/50 chance of working (works if he turns hot on first) and turn the water heater all the way up.

You can put cat turds or general litter box contents inside his heat vents of his bedroom-see him get laid after that! Any time he has a girl over, you turn the heat up lol

I could go on and on, pranking is pretty easy if you have an evil streak.
 

RockstarParkingDude

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the best way to win a prank war is to escalate it so much faster than he does that he truly fears what will come next. prank him 3 times, 3 times as hard as he got you.

take a habanero pepper and rub it on his toothbrush.

put an add up on craigslist with his picture in the men looking for men section. make it graphic, leave his number.

take all of his shoes dip them in water and freeze them. dont worry if it ruins them, he messed with you first, its his fault. it will serve as a lesson to everyone that you are not to be fucked with.
 

Closed039

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I agree with the first two suggestions rockstar but he probably should try to steer away from property damage. Additionally, you always need to be prepared for the fact that his roomate may turn out to be an even sicker fuck and "rise" to the occasion of the upped ante.
 

Batwoman

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If you escalate it, you have no idea where it will end.
Don't go there if you are not willing to live with the consequences.
If you hate pranks, just end it. Cut the lock off, find a new roommate.
Don't play his games.
 
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RockstarParkingDude

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i generally shy away from property damage in pranks too, but if its getting someone back then i dont mind so much, they brought it upon themselves.

if someone does come back at you, you up the ante much further and hit them 3 times as often. take it beyond the prank and into straight malicious territory.

a buddy did this: got the kids phone while he was at class, called his grandmother and said this 'your grandson just died' and hung up. it made the point

or you take the same habanero pepper and rub it on the button and zipper of all his pants.

or you literally poop in his bed.
 

PEnoob

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Unscrew the shower head and put some crushed up lifesavers in it and he won't be able to towell off.
OR, take all his clean underwear, throw them in the sink and wet them down and wring them out,then
place them in the freezer.
 

RIB2211

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If you escalate it, you have no idea where it will end.
Don't go there if you are not willing to live with the consequences.
If you hate pranks, just end it. Cut the lock off, find a new roommate.
Don't play his games.

Pretty much did this. I came home from class and caught him trying to move my bed out to the frontyard. I locked him out of the house (he had only gotten my frame out the door). After ten minutes I let him back in, and told him that I just really wanted the lock off so I could get to my food. He said no, because he wanted to win. So I said "Alright, take the lock off and I'll owe you one (a ride somewhere, something)". He was like "That means I win! Done!" and took the lock off.

I really don't give a sh*t, I move out in a month to live with some other guys. I'll just deny his favor any time he asks, and say I'm too busy. Not gonna lie though, it was fun to see him jump around his truck while confetti was flying everywhere.
 

winning

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In case you or someone one else is looking for a good way to prank go w Liquid Ass, 5 bucks shipped on amazon, no trace and the place you spray (car, room) will smell like an ass for a long time. Besides that the beeest is the $500 or free crappy car on craigslist ad with their number, their phone will be in operable. Sometimes you just need to let out your inner jerk. Maybe get him really good the day u move out
 

Pegasus

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Still don't understand why you just didn't cut the lock off at the start thats what i did in those situations and it works well.
Everybody knows I have no sense of humour and leaves me alone.
Ps
Put prawns in his truck as you leave.
 

RIB2211

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Still don't understand why you just didn't cut the lock off at the start thats what i did in those situations and it works well.
Everybody knows I have no sense of humour and leaves me alone.
Ps
Put prawns in his truck as you leave.

I tried to man, but all I had were wire cutters...I needed bolt cutters, and it's not like college kids have those layin around!
 

JFPowertop

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My brother had this guy at work that pranked everyone non stop, so one day the people at his job mixed up some chocolate milk with exlax let prankster drink it and then put super glue on the toilet seat.
I haven't heard of him pranking anyone recently.
 
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