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#SexColumn: Men can lose their sex drive too

#SexColumn: Men can lose their sex drive too

Sep 25, 2020

By Sharon Gordon

This article is a repost which originally appeared on IOL

Edited for content

Every joke I’ve ever heard about lack of libido or not wanting to have sex has had a woman as the brunt. In reality many women report that their partners are more often than not the cause for a drop in sexual activity.

Men can also feel asexual, not enjoy sex and find themselves in a slump. The difference is nobody will admit to it or discuss it.

So let’s talk about the top 10 things that can kill your sex drive and your penis. Doctors often refer to ED (erectile dysfunction) as the first signs of early death. I don’t want to be alarmist but the penis and its ability to be erect is a fantastic gauge for health.

ED is the first sign that you may have one of the big three chronic conditions; hypertension, cardiac problems or diabetes. They are easy to diagnose and treatable and yet many men ignore the signs because they are reluctant to admit that their erections are not what they used to be.

One of the big drug companies talk about the 5 finger erection. Hold your hand out in front of you, fingers outstretched, thumb facing up and pinkie finger to the floor. It is the perfect explanation of erections through the ages. The thumb indicates the strength and height of a young adolescent male and the pinkie that of an older male. No cause for concern, as long as the penis is still hard.

It’s when the penis can no longer obtain an erection that you should see your doctor. A real doctor, not some quack that is going to just prescribe ways to achieve and erection. You should be treating the cause and not just the symptom.

There are other reasons why your erection isn’t what it should be. I’ve already alluded to diabetes. Sugar affects testosterone production, making it harder to get an erection. So slow down on eating all those sweets and chocolates.

Inadequate sleep also affects testosterone levels and in turn your erection. I know that this year has shot stress levels through the roof, affecting everything from sleep to nutrition. Be aware of it and if necessary get help. Exercise and mediation can help but drugs may be necessary in acute cases.

Which brings me to exercise. Too much exercise, especially running and cycling could be doing more harm than good. British Columbia University did a study that alleges that more than 64km per week can drop testosterone levels by 17%.

I wonder if erections were stronger during the lockdown when alcohol was not available for sale. Alcohol consumption has a major impact on erections and inability to orgasm. Alcohol also affects testosterone levels.

I keep going on about the hormone testosterone. This is the libido driving hormone and without it your sex drive will tank. Men often lack enough testosterone. It is a simple blood test and is very easily treated. So if you feel something is off, get it tested. I know so many men who would rather bite the bullet than spend an hour at the doctor and get it sorted.

If you are spending too much time indoors you ay also be lowering testosterone production. You do need Vitamin D for production to happen. So why not take yourself out for a day in the outdoors. I have recently discovered that in and around Johannesburg there is plenty to do.

I have some bad news for the lactose intolerant and vegans. Harvard Medical School alleges a direct connection between Soy intake and erectile dysfunction. So if you have recently changed your diet to soy based foods and have been experiencing erectile issues, try cutting out the soy.

Every one of these causes can be addressed and I am by no means suggesting that these are the only causes for your penis not working as well as it should. My absolute opinion is that if it’s not working as well as it should seek medical assistance. There is no reason to be ashamed or embarrassed. Most women have their breasts and vaginas examined annually to ensure continued sexual health and men should get into the habit of doing the same.

In the interim, while you are sorting out the causes there are some adult toys that can help out in the play department. Penis pumps can help draw blood into the penis and thus help with a better erection. Once blood is in the penis use a simple cock ring to keep the blood there for the duration of play. Remove it before it becomes uncomfortable and no longer than 20 minutes.

For a little extra vooma, use a vibrating cock ring. You will maintain your erection and become a vibrator in one go. If your erection doesn’t work at all anymore, you can use a hollow strap on. The penis is placed inside the strap on and is then used to pleasure your partner the same way an erection would. Also remember that your mouth and hands can offer just as much pleasure when used correctly.

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