Time for Confession!

[Tamora]

When I was a "good" Catholic young boy I was always ecstatic about the fact that I could commit (pretty much) any sin and go to Holy Confession and have them forgiven by saying a few prayers as an Act of Contrition.

One event that I never confessed to was when I was about 8 or 9 years old and my father was decorating my sister's bedroom. I placed an upturned nail in the doorway and hid. He stood right on the nail, it penetrated his foot, he spent the day in hospital, had to have a tetanus injection in his arse and blamed my sister.

Now it's your turn...confess your sins...but it has to include your own Act of Contrition!

 

[burtybasset]

Awesome story, I'm a "good" Catholic too! Great minds think alike!

https://www.pegym.com/forums/gym/72642-burtys-confessional.html?highlight=burty's+confessional

 

[Tamora]

Awesome story, I'm a "good" Catholic too! Great minds think alike!

https://www.pegym.com/forums/gym/72642-burtys-confessional.html?highlight=burty's+confessional

And I thought I was being original! lmao

Sorry for raining on your parade Father Burty! May God have mercy on my soul!

 

[closed224]

Hhhmmmm, I have confessed a little to our dear BurtyBassett. So I guess I can go into the dark closet with you also.

Had a guy in high school shop class that could, had, would fix anything, build anything, oh and it would always be better than anyone else. So in a fit of youthful spite I threw 4 popcorn kernals in the gas tank of his Ford pick up.
When driving the fuel line would pick up a kernal and stop the flow of fuel. Then when testing the kernal would drop away and the truck would run fine. He never did correctly identify the problem. Before he ordered a bunch of wiring harnesses and spent money not just time I left a note for the shop teacher about what the problem was. Forgive me, but I still chuckle.

 

[Tamora]

Hhhmmmm, I have confessed a little to our dear BurtyBassett. So I guess I can go into the dark closet with you also.

Had a guy in high school shop class that could, had, would fix anything, build anything, oh and it would always be better than anyone else. So in a fit of youthful spite I threw 4 popcorn kernals in the gas tank of his Ford pick up.
When driving the fuel line would pick up a kernal and stop the flow of fuel. Then when testing the kernal would drop away and the truck would run fine. He never did correctly identify the problem. Before he ordered a bunch of wiring harnesses and spent money not just time I left a note for the shop teacher about what the problem was. Forgive me, but I still chuckle.

You bad, bad boy...God forgive your wickedness!!! And your Act of Contrition is???

 

[closed224]

Laughing this hard hurts my ribs sometimes. So self flagellation administered through the overwhelming pain of laughter? Maybe?

 

[burtybasset]

And I thought I was being original! lmao

Sorry for raining on your parade Father Burty! May God have mercy on my soul!

No need for apologies, there can be more than one thread on this if it's started by different people I think.

P.S. You are forgiven my son, now go sin some more, you will need something to confess next time!

 

[burtybasset]

Hhhmmmm, I have confessed a little to our dear BurtyBassett. So I guess I can go into the dark closet with you also.

Had a guy in high school shop class that could, had, would fix anything, build anything, oh and it would always be better than anyone else. So in a fit of youthful spite I threw 4 popcorn kernals in the gas tank of his Ford pick up.
When driving the fuel line would pick up a kernal and stop the flow of fuel. Then when testing the kernal would drop away and the truck would run fine. He never did correctly identify the problem. Before he ordered a bunch of wiring harnesses and spent money not just time I left a note for the shop teacher about what the problem was. Forgive me, but I still chuckle.

Was there any popcorn from his exhaust?

 

[longerlastingnoob]

I confess.

I used to hit myself and petend to cry in the back of the car when my dad was driving, so my sister would get in trouble, but she ( only 3 ) would do it when my mam was driving, which ended in me getting in more trouble because they came to realise i was pretending, but didn't think she was because "she's just a baby".

So contrition, kharma, whatever you want to call it.

 

[Tamora]

Laughing this hard hurts my ribs sometimes. So self flagellation administered through the overwhelming pain of laughter? Maybe?

I'm sorry Wishful...but pleasures of the flesh including masturbation is a deadly sin! That just won't do my son!

 

[closed224]

Hhhmmmm so I hear you saying I am going to die someday. I will go with that for my sin payment. I always try to pay my debts. Until then I guess I will keep masturbating. I would not want to be seen trying to avoid my deadly payoff.

 

[Frog]

I could and would bite my toe nails as a child:bad:

 

[Tamora]

I confess.

I used to hit myself and petend to cry in the back of the car when my dad was driving, so my sister would get in trouble, but she ( only 3 ) would do it when my mam was driving, which ended in me getting in more trouble because they came to realise i was pretending, but didn't think she was because "she's just a baby".

So contrition, kharma, whatever you want to call it.

My son, are you absolving yourself of your sins? That is a sin in itself! Three Hail Mary's and two Our Father's!

 

[Tamora]

I could and would bite my toe nails as a child:bad:

My child...to not confess your innermost sins is a sin in itself! Cleanse your soul!

 

[lilbigman]

I used to go to a catholic school when I was young. 2 of them actually, and was expelled from both and ended up in the public school system after that. The first one I got caught trying to pay a girl with pennies to kiss me, and also had this little gorilla that when you squeezed it, it's penis would pop out. Both my pennies and my gorilla were confiscated and I wasn't allowed back the following year. So my mom then put me in Saint Boniface just down the road. One day they had a little game where you could win little prizes. I won a mini sized bible. At recess I was trying to auction off my mini bible to the highest bidder, but was caught by sister Katherine. I had it up to 5 bucks too. That would have been a lot of candy back then. Needless to say because of this and other small transgressions (like getting into and eating a bunch of the communion wafers) I attended public school the following year. Which I was fine with because the nuns there always carried around rulers that my knuckles got to know very well. Ah yes, it was a different time back then. Teachers could actually beat you for misbehaving. :angel:

 

[burtybasset]

I confess.

I used to hit myself and petend to cry in the back of the car when my dad was driving, so my sister would get in trouble, but she ( only 3 ) would do it when my mam was driving, which ended in me getting in more trouble because they came to realise i was pretending, but didn't think she was because "she's just a baby".

So contrition, kharma, whatever you want to call it.

Kharma is lovely, I usually go for the veggie with pilau rice and a peshwari naan bread. Mmmmmmmmm

I used to go to a catholic school when I was young. 2 of them actually, and was expelled from both and ended up in the public school system after that. The first one I got caught trying to pay a girl with pennies to kiss me, and also had this little gorilla that when you squeezed it, it's penis would pop out. Both my pennies and my gorilla were confiscated and I wasn't allowed back the following year. So my mom then put me in Saint Boniface just down the road. One day they had a little game where you could win little prizes. I won a mini sized bible. At recess I was trying to auction off my mini bible to the highest bidder, but was caught by sister Katherine. I had it up to 5 bucks too. That would have been a lot of candy back then. Needless to say because of this and other small transgressions (like getting into and eating a bunch of the communion wafers) I attended public school the following year. Which I was fine with because the nuns there always carried around rulers that my knuckles got to know very well. Ah yes, it was a different time back then. Teachers could actually beat you for misbehaving. :angel:

Man, that was a bit harsh! I'm sure if you'd have cut them in on the action they would have just given a telling off and not to do it again.

P.S. Congratulations on the member of the month! Well deserved!

 

[longerlastingnoob]

Kharma is lovely, I usually go for the veggie with pilau rice and a peshwari naan bread. Mmmmmmmmm



Man, that was a bit harsh! I'm sure if you'd have cut them in on the action they would have just given a telling off and not to do it again.

P.S. Congratulations on the member of the month! Well deserved!

Which action, the auctioning or the kissing?

 

[burtybasset]

Which action, the auctioning or the kissing?

Probably the auction, don't wanna push your luck, vows of celibacy and all.