Okay, it's been some time since I've made this LOG. I haven't posted because I believe I'm closed to cured.
After reading the last thread of a guy overcoming this, it came to my mind how simple it looks overcoming this. The hard part, I believe, is overcoming the mental barriers(overcoming porn addiction - if you have one, bad masturbation habits, arousal spikes, etc).
For the past months, one problem that I've really been struggling with is porn because of my lack of sexual experience so getting hard with imagination isn't that easy. I've kind of overcame this. Last time I watched porn was when I got my FL to try out the waters and a week ago when I was gone due to high stress which I will never do again because it just made it worse, but other than that, I'm all good.
Another problem, bad masturbation habits. Oh boy, the amount of times I'd start masturbating with the mindset of lasting 20 minutes and 2 minutes in I'm stroking my dick like I have a quick time event in a game and you have to smash a button really fast, while also kegeling. I can say I still do this sometimes but I've realized it doesn't feel good at all(only in the moment) and for the long term it sucks, so I kind of stopped doing it and I'm still improving. The EQ problem is also part of this combined with porn, I still get very hard at times but I'm still not on that 100% hard-rock state.
I still sometimes masturbate and come in a few minutes, I've stopped thinking every session must be 10+ minutes long, I have friends whose sexual lives are very good and I've never heard them tell me they masturbate for 20 minutes, they all do it fast but they don't have any other problems since they overcame them. I believe edging helps with the mental side of the problems and ofcourse if you're on that extreme side of always coming in a few seconds to train your brain on not dong it every time.
The last and the biggest problem, arousal. Again, oh boy, my arousal spikes were the biggest problem in this journey and still are. With the lack of sexual experience, my mind is still kind of bugged and I look at girls in a sexual way, WAY too much. I'm really improving on this day-to-day but its the hardest thing on the list tbh, this is what made me crave porn and what makes me want to masturbate every time I see a girl I like post some good pictures.
Now, after listing my problems, why am I saying I'm almost cured? Well, I've read some recent thread of someone saying they overcame this and how they did it and it didn't surprise me to see such a small list of things he did which got him cured. I've wrote in here about my EQ problem until Anthony said that it is maybe a stimulation problem and that I should try a FL. I kept thinking about it and finally bought one. Not gonna lie, I was a little nervous seeing reviews of people saying they came in a few seconds or how much better it feels than the real thing but surprisingly, like I said 2 posts ago, I could last long and thrust hard, fast, because I wasn't HAVING any of the problems above - in the moment(EQ was pretty good, didn't kegel, didn't think of coming too fast, my arousal was under control and I didn't CARE if I come too fast, which made me last really long and tbh I felt like I could thrust that thing as much as I wanted).
So, the main point of this is: as long as I'm staying the same during normal masturbation or during sex, everything's gonna be alright. If I look at the recent guy who said he cured himself, it is the same: he stopped watching porn, he taught himself to last 10, 15, 20 minutes while masturbating, no kegeling, arousal under control, etc. I'll write in here when I'll get a girl and tell y'all guys how it went down, I don't know how long it'll take since college opens back up only next month but I'll be sure to come in here to tell you if I am really cured.