ok so this started online but developed into the love of my life. she was in tunisia and me in england we saw each other fell in love. she then moved to france and her visa was running out so she had to marry someone else. we rekindled our love a month back but shes still married to this dude. and shes just told me that this dude is the size of her arm. and seriously could be in porn. she wants me back but i dont want to disapoint. she isnt joking when she said she had diffuclty getting him in. were talking the size of a ladies arm here. my ego wont let it drop for some reason. i asked her to get a measurement so i know what im up against. i was her first and then she gets a guy like that and then after she wont be able to feel me. thats what i feel like. anyone else had this issue?
My current realtionship issues
- Thread starter SirGainzalot
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You have nothing to worry about. You are well above avg length. Plus it is obvious to the reader that this doesn't matter if she is willing to get back with you. Just focus on your PE until you meet up with her. Don't let some other guys size make you feel not enough. Not all women are comfortable with huge size. Maybe this is painful for her and yours is perfect. Bottom line... Relax and if the chance happens...bang it out 
. Good luck!
. Good luck!She wants you for you plain and simple. Someone is always going to be bigger you gotta focus on you and build your confidence so this issue doesn't ruin your chance with her if you really love her.
yeh but shes been with this dude for 2 years ive seen things online like "the phantom penis" issue. where there expecting more from there usual size when they change partners. i know were going to be madly in love together and this is superficial but something insinctivley cares and wont drop the issue.
thank you i like that.
i guess theres always going to be someone bigger and better than you in any field of life. i just want to be that guy for her so that she wont even have to think about the current douchebag shes with.
im a very good lover naturally and i can pleasure the crap out of most women. ive done extensive research into daoist methods. aswell as studied many books on tantric sex etc etc. so ive got that covered. but ive always felt slightly insecure about my cock even tho im above average in length. i gues i would like to have a fatter cock. as im quite skinny.
Sean Jacobs
Retired Moderator, Member of the Month Dec 2012,
In my opinion, the bigger question is....will you be able to deal with it? Women care far less about penis size than men. She will love you because of who you are not the size of your penis.
However, will you worry every time you are intimate? Will you constantly feel inadequate? Will you dwell on the fact that she's had bigger? These things will kill your relationship. You MUST let it go to be happy.
#1 Rule in a relationship: NEVER ask about size! Not about her past lovers, not about your own...EVER!! When you ask it clearly demonstrates a lack of confidence, and that can kill her attraction to you. Women generally don't like men who lack confidence.
However, will you worry every time you are intimate? Will you constantly feel inadequate? Will you dwell on the fact that she's had bigger? These things will kill your relationship. You MUST let it go to be happy.
#1 Rule in a relationship: NEVER ask about size! Not about her past lovers, not about your own...EVER!! When you ask it clearly demonstrates a lack of confidence, and that can kill her attraction to you. Women generally don't like men who lack confidence.
Sean Jacobs
Retired Moderator, Member of the Month Dec 2012,
It is quite normal to feel some level of insecurity. What if she was married to a billionaire? Or a famous handsome actor? It is a similar issue. That feeling of "How can I compete with that???" Men are naturally competitive. We don't like being "out done" especially by men who have been with our current lover. You are going to think about it, no question (I know I would). The key isn't figuring out why you can't let it go. The key is to NEVER mention it, or talk about it, or demonstrate in anyway you are bothered by it. She must never know you are bothered by this. Once you have been together for a while those feelings will pass with time and you will settle into the everyday life in a long term relationship. Sex won't be as important as loving each other.
Sean Jacobs
Retired Moderator, Member of the Month Dec 2012,
By the way, if she is the one who continues to talk about it (and you never bring it up) than there is a larger issue and you may want to find another woman.
we have a tough road ahead of us. shes gotta get a visa to work and get a job that pays enough for her to move out then she has to go through a divorce and some how stay in france. then she needs to have enough money to come over to england for a marriage visa. its going to be so hard.
. but so worth it . true love man once you know you know. she has told me on several occasions it doesnt matter. and she knows she can only be happy with me. its just that bugs the **** out of me. since i was her first and i wanted it to always be that way since we loved each other. man its a tough situation. meanwhile im stuck in england with no pussy to play with. she says i can go get a **** buddy. but my heart cant take that at all ive done that too much. she says she doesnt feel comfortable having sex with me until shes divorced out of principle. but shes told me she loves me. so so complicated.
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Sean Jacobs
Retired Moderator, Member of the Month Dec 2012,
we have a tough road ahead of us. shes gotta get a visa to work and get a job that pays enough for her to move out then she has to go through a divorce and some how stay in france. then she needs to have enough money to come over to england for a marriage visa. its going to be so hard.
It sounds complicated, but it will be worth it in the end. Good luck. I hope all goes well for the both of you.
i feel it will i just hope i have the patience. i know i do but not being able to have sex is probably going to kill me. im sure when we hook up i think she will change her mind on that.
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Wow this whole situation is jacked up. If I were you, I'd say "okay sweety, I hope you find happiness with this guy." Not because of his size, but...
Seriously, she married him for the visa? And she's going to come to you while still married? and you're cool with that?
to answer the question: no this has never happened to me. I typically don't concern myself with the dongs of other men. There are enough troubles in my life and in the world that I don't need to add to any anxieties there so I put up a mental boundary and stop caring.
To address the issue you have of not being "felt" by her: I'll remind you that tissues stretch and tissues return to normal size. It's not like she has sex with a big guy and BAM that's it - big gaping hole between her legs and nothing else is ever going to be significant ever again.
Lesbians do just fine in the sex department, I'm sure you can too. Google Nina Hartley's "how to eat pussy like a champ." That's a good start. There are other things you can do that will make her forget about size altogether. Most of the orgasms I give my girls are with my fingers.
Also consider that she might not enjoy a large size. You seem to think that she loves the sex with him. Maybe she does. Maybe it hurts her. Maybe she thought you were the perfect size. Maybe women don't put as much concern on size as you do. Maybe you're projecting your own insecurities onto other people. I don't know. I think it's generally a good idea to question the thoughts you have that make you feel fearful or less-than something else.
To address the underlying issue of you feeling insecure: that's a much deeper problem. A bigger peen won't help you feel less insecure, by the way.
Seriously, she married him for the visa? And she's going to come to you while still married? and you're cool with that?
to answer the question: no this has never happened to me. I typically don't concern myself with the dongs of other men. There are enough troubles in my life and in the world that I don't need to add to any anxieties there so I put up a mental boundary and stop caring.
To address the issue you have of not being "felt" by her: I'll remind you that tissues stretch and tissues return to normal size. It's not like she has sex with a big guy and BAM that's it - big gaping hole between her legs and nothing else is ever going to be significant ever again.
Lesbians do just fine in the sex department, I'm sure you can too. Google Nina Hartley's "how to eat pussy like a champ." That's a good start. There are other things you can do that will make her forget about size altogether. Most of the orgasms I give my girls are with my fingers.
Also consider that she might not enjoy a large size. You seem to think that she loves the sex with him. Maybe she does. Maybe it hurts her. Maybe she thought you were the perfect size. Maybe women don't put as much concern on size as you do. Maybe you're projecting your own insecurities onto other people. I don't know. I think it's generally a good idea to question the thoughts you have that make you feel fearful or less-than something else.
To address the underlying issue of you feeling insecure: that's a much deeper problem. A bigger peen won't help you feel less insecure, by the way.
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im ok with that because the other option was to be deported back to tunisia where she would just be another muslim girl when she clearly isnt that way mentally. if she was deported back to tunisia that would be the death of her independance. her family would keep her in check and she wouldnt be able to live an independant life. so she chose the lesser of two evils. we recently got back intouch and the first time we got back in touch she nearly broke down ad cried because i still existed. i forgive her because i understand the situation and the choice. she knows she made the wrong choice and shes had just as bad of a time without me drinking herself into a stupper to try and forget me so she can be happy with this other dude. and being put into situations where she just doesnt bleong because of the seedy lifestyle this other dude has. im basically being a white knight for her. shes got reinvigored hope in life again shes happy and she feels inspired to be independant for herslef because of me. and i feel the same way. the technicalities of this sucks. but the emotion and love are too strong to ignore. it may take a few years to finally get settled down but then we have the rest of our lives to really enjoy each other. im sure after an ordeal such as this we would never want to be apart.
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I lead a very comfortable life in my white, middle-class suburban bubble. I sometimes forget that people have some tough choices to make, choices that make my life look rather simple.
I hope the decision you make towards this woman leads to your ultimate happiness. I've heard that people who do things to try to 'save' another are often met with the polar opposite reaction. You do good, something negative hits you some time later. No good deed goes unpunished, as the saying goes.
If you were my friend in real life and told me this, I would give a word of caution: her life is not your responsibility. If you're seeking to help her, there are many options available to you. I don't know your full situation or the history you two share, but I'm getting the sense this isn't totally healthy.
I hope the decision you make towards this woman leads to your ultimate happiness. I've heard that people who do things to try to 'save' another are often met with the polar opposite reaction. You do good, something negative hits you some time later. No good deed goes unpunished, as the saying goes.
If you were my friend in real life and told me this, I would give a word of caution: her life is not your responsibility. If you're seeking to help her, there are many options available to you. I don't know your full situation or the history you two share, but I'm getting the sense this isn't totally healthy.
Honestly, it sounds like you are lying to yourself a bit. You are talking about this whole situation as if you had always known that she was the one, and likewise the other way around. Why then, does it seem like both of you are treating each other as a Plan B? If you guys are so perfect and destined for one another, what happened during these two or more years where she was with this other guy?
I'm not trying to make assumptions about you or this relationship, but you've left some massive holes in the story that kind of need to be filled before anyone can give you sane relationship advice. Aslo, I'm not from the UK, but in the USA when a foreign spouse breaks off a marriage for any reason other than physical abuse, they have to return to their own country. And no, getting quickly remarried to someone else does not absolve them of this punishment.
This whole situation sounds, as Toadstool said, quite unhealthy.
I'm not trying to make assumptions about you or this relationship, but you've left some massive holes in the story that kind of need to be filled before anyone can give you sane relationship advice. Aslo, I'm not from the UK, but in the USA when a foreign spouse breaks off a marriage for any reason other than physical abuse, they have to return to their own country. And no, getting quickly remarried to someone else does not absolve them of this punishment.
This whole situation sounds, as Toadstool said, quite unhealthy.
