Introducing Myself

[Randy the Ram]

Hi Ram and welcome! Sorry to hear about your situation. I've been there and I'm afraid in the past I've also put someone that was very dear to me in that same situation you're in.

I do believe there is a perfect girl out there for you, and I'm pretty sure she will appear somewhere around when you stop searching for "perfect" (and of course you need to have taken a few steps on your road to self improvement). In my opinion perfect isn't something that is found or just exists, it is something you create and it is not constant - meaning it has to be worked on all the time and sometimes it may even conflict with what you thought was perfect for you and it's how you deal with that fact, that I believe is one key to having a "perfect" relationship (not a "perfect girl").

If there's something like an advice here I think it is this: If you're searching for perfect, you will always end up finding flaws and then you will fail. Little by little it'll be a long road of small disappointments. Rethink the concept of perfect and you will succeed (in life, PE and the gym) - perfect is created by hard work.

Even if you're not in the right place at the moment, you will get there and these forums and the people here will gladly help you get there. And then all of a sudden your old girlfriend, who you thought was the perfect girl you, will be nothing more than a shadow of the past.

Thank you for the advice. I should have worded things a little better. I'm not searching for perfect, but rather I'm growing impatient waiting for that perfect fit that I know God has planned for me. The older I get, the more uncertainty bothers me.

 

[Randy the Ram]

22 lbs! That's a huge amount, congratulations!!!! If you've gotten that much off, I know you can do the rest.... and more besides. Have you been exercising? Exercise will make you feel better under almost any circumstances, I've found.

Thank you for the welcome. I have exercised quite a bit. I've hit a plateau of late though. I kept a pace of 1 lb. or weight loss per day for exactly 3 weeks. I started at 208 lbs., and I'm currently at 186 at the moment. That might not seem like much to some of you, but I'm not a real tall guy.

 

[Randy the Ram]

Hi, Randy, a belated welcome to the forums.


As a fellow fattie, allow me to offer some encouragement. You've apparently dropped quite a bit already and that's great. As you drop weight and begin living again you'll find some of your testosterone production bounces back. I encourage some degree of physical activity each day, whether walking for a little while or going to a gym -- do SOMETHING for the body and the mind will go along with it.

As for measuring and starting your PE journey, remember -- PE isn't just about size, it's about HEALTH. For now, if "the little guy" (as you put it) isn't quite up to snuff, then rather than worrying about measurements, just focus on some mild stretching (the same kind of casual stretching we men do when we're sitting around in our shorts watching television, nothing forceful) and massage.

When more weight drops off and YOU feel better overall, that activity alone will have helped Mr. Happy along the road to recovery, and it will help YOU for now if you stop worrying just yet about measuring and numbers. If your penis HEALTH isn't cutting it, then the numbers themselves are meaningless, useless.

As I've told countless trainees in weighlifting before, we all have to start somewhere and the guy you see pushing hundreds of pounds was NOT doing that on his first day!

One thing at a time; it's a marathon, not a sprint.

Good luck, and again -- welcome!

That's really encouraging advice. I appreciate that very much. I'm very much looking forward to getting in a routine, but I've been under a tremendous level of anxiety and stress over a break up, and I believe it's affected me physically as well as emotionally.

 

[Randy the Ram]

welcome brother!

get the free news(email) letter from david deangelo.com it will help you get back on the playing field with confidence..and good luck with your P>E goals


ps i am not affiliated with deanglo just a good free newsletter to have

Thank you, brother. I will indeed take a look at Mr. Deangelo's site.

 

[calixto]

Thank you, brother. I will indeed take a look at Mr. Deangelo's site.

Hahaha, that's funny, I get David DeAngelo's emails. They are FREAKIN AWESOME!!! And they also offer alot of information for free. I would get them if I were you.

Its funny, heard long ago about a story about Dr. Richard Fineman. He walked in a bar and saw a "not so attractive man" with several hot ladies around him.

He asked the guy "How do you do it?" The man replied, "There are 3 rules":

1) Never buy them ANYTHING.
2) Treat them as if they are unimportant to you.
3) Ask directly for sex

And there was an Addendum to Rule #3: "Should they refuse, GO IMMEDIATELY ON TO THE NEXT ONE!!!"

This is amazing how well it works,... BUT it is NOT necessarily great for beginning lasting relationships!

 

[Batwoman]

This is amazing how well it works,... BUT it is NOT necessarily great for beginning lasting relationships!

Gee, ya think?

 

[Quirky One-Eye]

That's really encouraging advice. I appreciate that very much. I'm very much looking forward to getting in a routine, but I've been under a tremendous level of anxiety and stress over a break up, and I believe it's affected me physically as well as emotionally.

RAM, there's a very good chance it's affecting you physically. However, it makes my advice about NOT WORRYING ABOUT size right now even more pertinent.

Focus on your overall health as I described, keep your PE related to simple stretches and massage for now, and you'll see TWO things with the passage of time:

1. You'll feel better physically, which will begin to reflect in your penile health.
2. As with all relationship endings, time heals. When this one starts to fade (as it WILL eventually, trust me) your stress-related problems and their physical manifestations will begin to clear up.

It just takes time and the act of placing your focus elsewhere. Stick with it, you'll be okay.

 

[Randy the Ram]

I have an update. All of my blood work came back normal including Thyroid and Testosterone. Really makes me wonder what's going on with my body. The only reasonable explanation I have left is that the high level of anxiety I've been under is affecting my mood, performance, and functions. It's really a bummer.

 

[Batwoman]

Depression, stress, and anxiety can completely change the hormone balances in your body. They do affect you physically, and in a big way.
It's great news that your thyroid and testosterone levels are normal -- because it means that you WILL get better as you slowly recover your emotional footing. These are not things that can be rushed, you have to be patient (I know that is easy to say and hard to do.... but you know what I mean).

Try to take one day at a time. Work on short-term goals: getting to the gym today, cooking a decent meal, reading a book, PE. Do things that you are know are good for you and will improve your physical and mental health, even if you have to force yourself to do them. I know the emotional trauma rules your world right now, but it will start to fade with time. Focus on the good stuff in your life, and slowly you will start to feel better. As the stress and anxiety diminish, your hormone balance will start to shift back to normal. Right now your body is in crisis mode -- it is trying to make sure that you eat, sleep, and find shelter, little else. But that will pass with time.