Help! How to Get Rid of Extreme Involuntary Kegels?

[mistahbo]

Hi all! I'm started working on my lifelong PE again after getting out of my previous relationship a couple of months ago. Since then, I've paid more attention to what is specifically happening when I'm masturbating. I've started to notice that I the moment I start stroking my penis my body does an involuntary kegel (IK) and holds it until I stop the stroke. I'm feeling this by using my fingers to press on my perineum. That area tightens up the very moment I start my stroke and gets released when I let go of my penis and consciously relax that area. I'm not sure how common this is, but I would sure appreciate some advice on how to counteract these extreme IKs. Unfortunately, reverse kegeling (RK) while I'm stroking doesn't appear to release the IK clench. Also, when I RK l I feel it a lot in my anus (it moves outwards) but not at all in my penis area. Is this normal?

The only way I seem to be able to prevent the involuntary kegel/clench is by stroking my penis extremely slowly i.e very unrealistically. Then the involuntary kegel doesn't happen. The way the IK clench feels is extremely subconscious and as if the muscle is very tight and hyperactive. As if there's a 1:1 correlation in my mind/body between stroking the penis and clenching my pelvic floor.

Please let me know what techniques and training methods you would suggest. All help and guidance is greatly appreciated! Many thanks.

 

[Shmendrix]

Hi all! I'm started working on my lifelong PE again after getting out of my previous relationship a couple of months ago. Since then, I've paid more attention to what is specifically happening when I'm masturbating. I've started to notice that I the moment I start stroking my penis my body does an involuntary kegel (IK) and holds it until I stop the stroke. I'm feeling this by using my fingers to press on my perineum. That area tightens up the very moment I start my stroke and gets released when I let go of my penis and consciously relax that area. I'm not sure how common this is, but I would sure appreciate some advice on how to counteract these extreme IKs. Unfortunately, reverse kegeling (RK) while I'm stroking doesn't appear to release the IK clench. Also, when I RK l I feel it a lot in my anus (it moves outwards) but not at all in my penis area. Is this normal?

The only way I seem to be able to prevent the involuntary kegel/clench is by stroking my penis extremely slowly i.e very unrealistically. Then the involuntary kegel doesn't happen. The way the IK clench feels is extremely subconscious and as if the muscle is very tight and hyperactive. As if there's a 1:1 correlation in my mind/body between stroking the penis and clenching my pelvic floor.

Please let me know what techniques and training methods you would suggest. All help and guidance is greatly appreciated! Many thanks.

My opinion is not evidence based but I suffer from the same issue and I started to think that maybe that slow unrealistcal stroking is the key to get rid of the ik's. As you just said, there is a body mind link between stroking and Ik's so that's can be a efficient way of training a new link between stroking and Pelvic floor muscles reaction.

 

[Dreadsteed]

I would say that you need to learn how to do a front reverse kegel rather than a full RK. You can slightly clench the muscles of the levator ani and do a RK at the same time and it will help push the pressure above the anus and towards your perineum. That will help place the RK in the right spot to help counteract the IKs. The major thing after that is lowering overall PF tension by constantly throughout the day trying to consciously relax the PF whenever you feel your body taking over and clenching your BC muscles. It is under both somatic and tonic autonomic control, so it will always try to clench to some degree. By conditioning your body to relax more at rest it will help with hypertonicity. A properly placed RK will also push away IKs. It doesn’t always have to be a strong push, it can be quite light.

 

[mistahbo]

My opinion is not evidence based but I suffer from the same issue and I started to think that maybe that slow unrealistcal stroking is the key to get rid of the ik's. As you just said, there is a body mind link between stroking and Ik's so that's can be a efficient way of training a new link between stroking and Pelvic floor muscles reaction.

Yeah, I'm inclined to agree. When I do the unrealistic slow stroke I sense how strong my mind is working to avoid the clenching/IK reflex. Undoing that body mind link is really the key here.

I would say that you need to learn how to do a front reverse kegel rather than a full RK. You can slightly clench the muscles of the levator ani and do a RK at the same time and it will help push the pressure above the anus and towards your perineum. That will help place the RK in the right spot to help counteract the IKs. The major thing after that is lowering overall PF tension by constantly throughout the day trying to consciously relax the PF whenever you feel your body taking over and clenching your BC muscles. It is under both somatic and tonic autonomic control, so it will always try to clench to some degree. By conditioning your body to relax more at rest it will help with hypertonicity. A properly placed RK will also push away IKs. It doesn’t always have to be a strong push, it can be quite light.

Yes! This is really helpful advice. What does a levator ani clench feel like? Any advice on pin-pointing that muscle in my mind/body? I'm going to try to this out. And the advice for relaxing the PF is helpful too. I'm paying a lot more attention to my PF throughout the day. I have a feeling that this kind of awareness will build up over time and allow for the mapping between my mind and those underused muscles to solidify.

 

[Dreadsteed]

Yes! This is really helpful advice. What does a levator ani clench feel like? Any advice on pin-pointing that muscle in my mind/body? I'm going to try to this out. And the advice for relaxing the PF is helpful too. I'm paying a lot more attention to my PF throughout the day. I have a feeling that this kind of awareness will build up over time and allow for the mapping between my mind and those underused muscles to solidify.

This is a Posterior Kegel or a PC (pubococcygeus) clench. The PC muscle is one of the muscles of the levator ani surrounding the anus which help lift the anus as well as the prostate through its fascial attachments. If you notice with the muscles around your sphincter you can either clench your sphincter, pull your sphincter inward lifting it, as well as doing both at the same time. A loose posterior kegel mainly clenches the sphincter, while a firm PK both clenches and lifts the levator ani muscles. Usually it only takes a loose PK to shift the RK pressure upwards from the anus towards the perineum and the BC muscles surrounding the inner shaft of the penis. RK too hard or too little and you’ll still get IKs, and the posterior kegel strength can direct where the RK pressure goes to help put it right on the BC muscles to suppress the autonomic IKs that pull you towards the Spasm Kegels leading into the PONR. Try to keep your BC muscles completely relaxed while doing the RK. Edging and listening to your body for that mind-muscle connect are absolutely key.

 

[closed489xyq40]

I’ve been dealing with IK’s for 5-6 years now. I get them all the time. Any type of pressure or touching of my glands no matter how light or intense will set them off. It’s extremely frustrating. I’ve been actively implementing different types of stretching and learning how to RK. I find it’s MOST effective for me to just relax. If my girl starts forplay and I start getting PF spasms RKs do absolutely nothing to stop them. The only thing that will stop them is if I 110% put effort and mindfulness into relaxing the entire area between my hips. That’s my glutes, lower abs, upper thighs, anus and perineum. Even then I can still feel very slight tensing of IC muscles but nowhere near as bad. It’s a really hard thing to break but I read all over these forums and guys overcome them in various different ways. Just have to find what works best for you

 

[TheAce]

I found stretching straight up was a big help. I also think hanging and ADS helped me as well...

 

[closed489xyq40]

I found stretching straight up was a big help. I also think hanging and ADS helped me as well...

Stretching straight up, hanging and an ads helped relieve IK’s?

 

[TheAce]

I believe they personally helped me - give it a try...

 

[Guriezous]

My opinion is not evidence based but I suffer from the same issue and I started to think that maybe that slow unrealistcal stroking is the key to get rid of the ik's. As you just said, there is a body mind link between stroking and Ik's so that's can be a efficient way of training a new link between stroking and Pelvic floor muscles reaction.

Sounds like I gotta do exactly that. I too get a IK the moment I stroke my penis, but when I do it so slow that there's no excitement at all the IKs are nonexistent, or at least it feels like that.