New member struggling with bad PE and needing help!

[Attero88]

Hi


I've had just recently started to have problems with PE and came across this site. I have had minor problems previously over the years but nothing I couldn't manage. I'm now 30 and in a relationship reaching the one year mark. Over the last 6 weeks my PE has gone from bad to worse and I am actually at the stage of struggling to have sex at all as I cum after putting it in or while putting it in! Even at that I'm lasting a minute or less.


I started doing kegel exercises about a month ago but this seems to have made me worse! Read up about reverse front kegels but can't do them (finding it hard to located the muscle) as I think I may have an imbalanced pelvic floor?


It's got to the stage now where I am losing weight from stress and anxiety over this and have booked to go see my doctor next week. From reading this site I do hold some hope but I just don't know where to start.


I'm thinking of banning porn for a month and only using mental stimulation to masturbate and trying edging? I am probably guilty of over masturbation over the past 15 years which i believe doesn't help. I just want to try and improve the situation as soon as I can but understand it may take time.


Any tips or advice?

 

[sameel]

Try reverse kegal breathing through the day and also during edging etc.: https://www.pegym.com/forums/premat...egel-breathing-meditative-reverse-kegels.html
Here is another good thread on reverse kegal: https://www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/42035-confusion-reverse-kegels.html

Counter your ejaculation reflex or involuntary kegal with "COMPETING" reverse kegal. Here is good thread:
https://www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/11391-solution-premature-ejaculation.html

You have trained yourself to get over excited and your arousal just builds rapidly. You need to rewire yourself. Get rid of porn and even control your thoughts so that you don't get over excited during edging. So edge slowly prolong it to half an hour or more by controlling your arousal with deep breathing, reverse kegal or just stopping and restarting again. This will rewire your brain to build the arousal slowly rather than rapidly and then initiate the ejaculation process.

Taking magnesium, methionin and Vitamin-C supplements also helps in controlling the over excitement.

 

[X Black]

I started doing kegel exercises about a month ago but this seems to have made me worse!

I'm not surprised. They did make it worse. You're most likely to have an unbalanced pelvic floor (and your "over masturbation" habit can be one of the reason why you do), your BC muscle is probably tight and contracts without you being aware of it. Practicing front kegels like the ones you've been doing can only make it worse.

Read up about reverse front kegels but can't do them

I also couldn't speak a word of english until 2 years ago. It takes time.

Any tips or advice?

Sameel gave you some good articles to read, especially to help you balance your pelvic floor.

As first step I would suggest you to become aware of your PONR by doing some basic Edging for a while (let's say 2-3 weeks). This will also help you direct your mind on your sensations, instead of letting it build up arousal beyond your awareness.

When you're ready add more types of stimulation (visual, auditory) and change position while edging in order to develop a stronger resistance and a wider sense of control.

Welcome to the gym.