I like a girl with a Boyfriend, advice?

[CompensatingForMuscleMass]

I'll be honest, I think this situation is unfair, and fucked up to be quite blatant. I can say that I am guilty of having sex with a girl multiple times who has a boyfriend. But shes a hoe, she fucks mad dudes, I was drunk, etc. That is different than actively trying to STEAL someones girlfriend. I understand that you are impatient, single, and all that. I am too. But I don't think you have any right getting involved. The fact that she is keeping an *almost* relationship, from her boyfriend of 6 years, is fucked up and actually pisses me off. Stories like this is the REASON I have trust issues, and trust issues is the reason my girlfriend I loved even left me. How can someone have faith in someone else when you hear about fucked up things like this happening? Have morals, don't be a selfish asshole dude. Thats someones LOVE and you are doing "EVERYTHING IN YOUR POWER" to take it away. We reap what we sow. I don't understand how people can relationship hop. 6 years? I was in a relationship for a year and a half, and now almost a year later, I STILL love that girl. I just don't get it. People are toasted these days man. **UPDATE: I just read that you didn't kiss her. Good man. I apologize for the nature of my post. Sometimes there is nothing you can do but have faith that someone will eventually come along for you. I know it sucks, and I know you have been at it longer than I. You will get yours, don't worry. Stay up buddy-o

I share the view on the relationship issues and how people are fucked up these days. But just having sex with a girl that has a bf because "she's a hoe" is way worse imo then trying to steal a guys gf because you want her bad and she is miserable with him.

You have trust issues because you are insecure. And you can easily love someone that you lost. They are not around to show off their imperfections, someone always looks better in your mind then they actually are.

 

[faithandhope]

I share the view on the relationship issues and how people are fucked up these days. But just having sex with a girl that has a bf because "she's a hoe" is way worse imo then trying to steal a guys gf because you want her bad and she is miserable with him.

You have trust issues because you are insecure. And you can easily love someone that you lost. They are not around to show off their imperfections, someone always looks better in your mind then they actually are.

I wouldn't call it "way worse" but yea, pretty shitty. To be slightly fair, ish, I had no intentions if she didn't come onto me so hard. She straight up just wanted the dick, we were drunk, all that good stuff and yea, I was insecure because I had just lost almost all touch with my family, moved out, lost my first love who I still loved, and was just scared to lose her. It seemed too good to be true most of the time. AND yea fucking tell me about that last part. We broke up for 4 months, no contact at all, and I put her on a pedestal. When we got back together, I'd forgot how bitchy she could actually be. Seems like I forgot again, to be honest.

 

[Scienceman]

You seem like a pretty shitty person.

If by shitty you mean that it was wrong of me to bang women with husbands or boyfriends, then you're entitled to our opinion. In some cases I have known the dude; and frankly I could care less they were cheated on. They're assholes who don't know how to treat a woman. The fact that I do is a gift I know I possess and I embrace it.

Your trust issues made a woman flee. You have caused pain for another.

I haven't.

Keep that in mind.

 

[Qarzan]

I've read the entire thread (although I suspect there were posts deleted by moderators since I didn't see many combative ones), and I realize that the kiss didn't happen, but I did want to chime in on the discussion, in the hopes it might help someone else.

Integrity. Just this.

I am the only one that has to live with myself. Am I ok with doing something like that? Am I ok with being that sort of person? These are the only questions that need to be answered. Ever.

If you are, that's great! Go ahead and do it. Everybody has the right to make their decisions however they like. And then accept responsibility for the outcome.

Of course, what this conduct means is open to interpretation. Different people will have different assigned meanings, and that is what we are seeing here in this thread. The most important thing, though, is what it means for YOU. And only you can answer that.

A post earlier mentioned that someone slept with an involved woman because she was a ho, and he was drunk. I personally see these "excuses" as an attempt to avoid responsibility for his own actions.

"It's not my fault. It's her fault. It's the alcohol's fault."

Personally, I would have brought it up in conversation. Let her know I'm interested, but keep my integrity intact by not causing her to cheat on her boyfriend. Or maybe clarify the situation, because who knows? Maybe they have an agreement where they can see other people. Assumptions tend to create unnecessary drama and tension. Communicate about these baseline assumptions first to see if there really is a problem, or if its just imagined.

Talking about it directly and clearly could clear up:
- whether or not she actually is unsatisfied with her current boyfriend. (You'd be surprised how good the human mind is at making sh*t up)
- whether or not she would actually be cheating on you if she kissed you/slept with you. (See above parenthetical explanation)

 

[Pegasus]

I felt dirty reading this thread.

 

[Ivor]

1. PE till you're hung like a blue whale
2. Beat boyfriend to death with penis
3. Grin at girl while raising one eyebrow
4. .....
5. Profit!

 

[faithandhope]

A post earlier mentioned that someone slept with an involved woman because she was a ho, and he was drunk. I personally see these "excuses" as an attempt to avoid responsibility for his own actions.

"It's not my fault. It's her fault. It's the alcohol's fault."

LOL, I don't really give a fuck to be quite honest, at all. I have no feelings for someone elses lose. Not my problem. I need no excuses for my actions. I've done some pretty shitty things in my life and remorse has never played a role in my actions. Of course, this is all just if your a stranger to me. Actually no, thats not true. I feel good making other people feel good, but I don't feel bad making them feel bad, if that makes sense. Maybe I'm a selfish asshole, not really sure. Its a possibility.. You'd have to be a pretty special person for me to give any of a sh*t was is happening in your life, lol. Alot of people front like they care, but do they ever really think about you when you aren't directly in front of them? No, probably not

 

[Toadstool]

Cool it guys.

 

[Qarzan]

LOL, I don't really give a fuck to be quite honest, at all. I have no feelings for someone elses lose. Not my problem. I need no excuses for my actions. I've done some pretty shitty things in my life and remorse has never played a role in my actions. Of course, this is all just if your a stranger to me. Actually no, thats not true. I feel good making other people feel good, but I don't feel bad making them feel bad, if that makes sense. Maybe I'm a selfish asshole, not really sure. Its a possibility.. You'd have to be a pretty special person for me to give any of a sh*t was is happening in your life, lol. Alot of people front like they care, but do they ever really think about you when you aren't directly in front of them? No, probably not

I didn't mean to say you were wrong. I was just analyzing your actions based on my perspective of what I would do. Of course you don't owe any excuses to anyone. That's not what I was saying.

I didn't call you a selfish asshole. All I said was that I would do it a different way. Not the right way. Not the wrong way. Just my way. You did it your way, I would do it my way. Nothing wrong with that. The OP was asking for different opinions, I provided mine. No harm, no foul.

"Alot of people front like they care, but do they ever really think about you when you aren't directly in front of them? No, probably not"

Yes, which is why I said that the only person whose opinion matters is my own. You feel perfectly fine with what you did. Can you live with what you did? Can you accept responsibility for it? If so, that's great. Keep doing that. And then I gave my opinion, which I'm entitled to do. That's all.

 

[faithandhope]

qarzan I may have come off wrong but I wasn't saying anything negatively towards you. The other guy, yes

 

[Qarzan]

qarzan I may have come off wrong but I wasn't saying anything negatively towards you. The other guy, yes

Ok, got it. Was just trying to explain that I didn't mean to say you were wrong, is all, in case you interpreted it as such.

 

[Scienceman]

She'll end up cheating with someone else and I don't blame her. You'll never know what could have been. Your loss.

 

[JuliusS]

If you are better than her boyfriend, then she will leave him for you. If not, then not. It's as easy as that.

She'll end up cheating with someone else and I don't blame her. You'll never know what could have been. Your loss.

Women only cheat when there is a better man out there. If you are the best man already, she has no incentive to cheat. Women are not built like men who want to have sex with as many females as possible and spread their seed far and wide across distant lands.

 

[snippan]

And U wondering why you have been single for so long time?

Dude U will always have in your mind that some day another guy will take her from you like you did one day.