I don't think i Will ever be able to make love with her again
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Marine Corps has a minimum enlistment of 4 years. I actually enlisted for 5. I did a year of DEP ( basically prior reserve service) and then was active for just shy of 2 years. I was then given an administrative seperation filed under a general or other than honorable not a dishonorable discharge. This happened because of some mental medical conditions including depression so in order to save money and paperwork for themselves they discharged me before my 2 years. Im not sure if many of you know this or not but all VA benefits do not count unless you have been in more than 2 years. Including the GI bill which you pay for. Almost all discharges take place before the 2 year mark even to battle active and injured armsmen.
Okay coke can was over kill. But It demonstrates my point that she wanted something she couldn't grab all the way around. and she wanted that not knowing anything about big dicks.
She has never been with a real dick that was bigger than mine. You guys all seem dead on. I have bothered her with this. I only started because i have a good intuition. I have been told this on several occasions and know it to be true. I could tell she wasn't happy. I didn't start asking her about until just a week ago. I have made her cum many times either by eating her out or fingering her clit. that is no problem. but she just is not satisfied with my dick when we fuck. Shes to nice to say so. But i can see it in her eyes.
A slave.. i can see why you'd say that. All i want to do is hear her say that she doesn't want any more from me and that she is 100% happy. Honestly im not sure if this is a bad thing. I love her so. and even though her inability to confront most aspects of this issue is frustrating i will never leave her. But there in lies the beast. I fear I may live the entirety of the rest of my life knowing that I, myself cannot satisfy my women, and i don't know about you men, but thats what makes me feel most like a man when i provide everything that my family and loved ones need.
Without her total sexual satisfaction and bonding how can i ever expect to feel like my desire to be a man is satisfied. How can i ever say. I AM ENOUGH.
INSECURITY-IMMATURITY
recently it seems i have struggled incredibly with both mentalities. I have always been insecure. When the effects of that are substantiated it seems difficult to be as mature as i should be. I feel like a prepubescent schoolboy.
I have not had a all the way erection in 3 days now. I have lost all feeling in my genital region. It is completely numb. It would seem that the physical-mental reactions are hand in hand. Has anyone else experienced this?
Okay coke can was over kill. But It demonstrates my point that she wanted something she couldn't grab all the way around. and she wanted that not knowing anything about big dicks.
She has never been with a real dick that was bigger than mine. You guys all seem dead on. I have bothered her with this. I only started because i have a good intuition. I have been told this on several occasions and know it to be true. I could tell she wasn't happy. I didn't start asking her about until just a week ago. I have made her cum many times either by eating her out or fingering her clit. that is no problem. but she just is not satisfied with my dick when we fuck. Shes to nice to say so. But i can see it in her eyes.
A slave.. i can see why you'd say that. All i want to do is hear her say that she doesn't want any more from me and that she is 100% happy. Honestly im not sure if this is a bad thing. I love her so. and even though her inability to confront most aspects of this issue is frustrating i will never leave her. But there in lies the beast. I fear I may live the entirety of the rest of my life knowing that I, myself cannot satisfy my women, and i don't know about you men, but thats what makes me feel most like a man when i provide everything that my family and loved ones need.
Without her total sexual satisfaction and bonding how can i ever expect to feel like my desire to be a man is satisfied. How can i ever say. I AM ENOUGH.
INSECURITY-IMMATURITY
recently it seems i have struggled incredibly with both mentalities. I have always been insecure. When the effects of that are substantiated it seems difficult to be as mature as i should be. I feel like a prepubescent schoolboy.
I have not had a all the way erection in 3 days now. I have lost all feeling in my genital region. It is completely numb. It would seem that the physical-mental reactions are hand in hand. Has anyone else experienced this?
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I think the biggest problem between the two of you is that you need better communication. I am absolutely positive that a 7 x 5 penis can and will satisfy her as well as any other woman. It is not your penis. She is young and scared and maybe in some degree this has affected her sexual drive which will lead to her being less stimulated. Odds are she is feeling exactly like you and is scared that you may leave. I would go and tell her that you two need to talk, about everything else. Help her out as well as your self and just figure out that between the two of you, you can make this work together. I truly wish you the best and if you go to any counseling maybe the two of you should go together. You are young, you have a very challenging road ahead of you(both of you). If you work together you can and will make this work, I really believe the sex is secondary to the stress and challenges you are facing
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You're 21 and are going to be a father soon?
Good luck. You're going to need it. You have bigger issues than your dick size coming towards you very fast.
Have you tried anal? It's usually a tighter fit.
There are these extender sleeves you can buy at a store. They add 1.5-3" in length a bit to girth. They're made to wrap around your ding dong during sex. Might be an option.
Another thing is maybe try a vibrator. Most women can't get off from penetration alone and need some other form of stimulation to have an orgasm. The dildo works great because it's a lot of stimulation on all of her nerve endings. The gspot is probably being stimulated while the walls are being stretched and rubbed. It's a lot to take.
Try something different. Buy yourself a vibrator and massage her clit with it while she rides you.
There's a toy called the We-vibe 2 (and 3) that acts like a clip over her pubic bone. It vibrates in two areas, her clit and her g-spot. It's good because it also vibrates along your shaft.
There are these creams you can buy that enhance sensitivity. If you rub her clit and other parts with it, she will feel you a whole lot more. It makes reaching orgasm easier.
Wipe those tears, soldier. You have a kid on the way and you're starting what should be a long-term relationship with someone. Insecurity is a huge turn off for a lot of women. I would be afraid of her leaving me.
Provide for her that infallible pillar of strength she can lean on when times are tough. It's just your dick size. Soon there will be financial troubles, school stresses, work stresses, all on top of that baby you're having. Get it together, man.
Good luck. You're going to need it. You have bigger issues than your dick size coming towards you very fast.
Have you tried anal? It's usually a tighter fit.
There are these extender sleeves you can buy at a store. They add 1.5-3" in length a bit to girth. They're made to wrap around your ding dong during sex. Might be an option.
Another thing is maybe try a vibrator. Most women can't get off from penetration alone and need some other form of stimulation to have an orgasm. The dildo works great because it's a lot of stimulation on all of her nerve endings. The gspot is probably being stimulated while the walls are being stretched and rubbed. It's a lot to take.
Try something different. Buy yourself a vibrator and massage her clit with it while she rides you.
There's a toy called the We-vibe 2 (and 3) that acts like a clip over her pubic bone. It vibrates in two areas, her clit and her g-spot. It's good because it also vibrates along your shaft.
There are these creams you can buy that enhance sensitivity. If you rub her clit and other parts with it, she will feel you a whole lot more. It makes reaching orgasm easier.
Wipe those tears, soldier. You have a kid on the way and you're starting what should be a long-term relationship with someone. Insecurity is a huge turn off for a lot of women. I would be afraid of her leaving me.
Provide for her that infallible pillar of strength she can lean on when times are tough. It's just your dick size. Soon there will be financial troubles, school stresses, work stresses, all on top of that baby you're having. Get it together, man.
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i agree with Pegasus. it is her responsibility to learn how to control her muscles down below. I recently went through this too. I normally don't care about previous partners or if she prefers bigger dicks, but what finding out what I found out did for me was snap me back to reality and make me feel like I have something to do.
I still suggest you not ask anything about this if you're capable of being damaged by the information. You really need to have a shield up because at the end of the day, no man is ever going to be "big enough" for the woman they're in love with. That woman will have had or will want bigger. It's just how it happens almost all of the time.
Most of it comes from a woman's inabillity to control her nether regions to get the maximum pleasure out of her partner. My previous partner had a MUCH bigger guy than me, BUT she "felt" really tight, and that's because she knew what she needed to do to get maximum pleasure out of our sex. She had plenty of orgasms with me and they were all real, but that's again, due to her ability to control her body to get the maximum pleasure out of sex with me.
It's her responsibility to conform her body. She definitely needs to learn about Kegels so she can get the most out of it. Your GF/wife is capable of penetrative orgasms with you, she just needs to get control of herself.
You are capable of giving plenty of women orgasms as we both started out at about the same size. I never had a woman not orgasm with me. So maybe work on your skills a little and have her work on her kegels.
I still suggest you not ask anything about this if you're capable of being damaged by the information. You really need to have a shield up because at the end of the day, no man is ever going to be "big enough" for the woman they're in love with. That woman will have had or will want bigger. It's just how it happens almost all of the time.
Most of it comes from a woman's inabillity to control her nether regions to get the maximum pleasure out of her partner. My previous partner had a MUCH bigger guy than me, BUT she "felt" really tight, and that's because she knew what she needed to do to get maximum pleasure out of our sex. She had plenty of orgasms with me and they were all real, but that's again, due to her ability to control her body to get the maximum pleasure out of sex with me.
It's her responsibility to conform her body. She definitely needs to learn about Kegels so she can get the most out of it. Your GF/wife is capable of penetrative orgasms with you, she just needs to get control of herself.
You are capable of giving plenty of women orgasms as we both started out at about the same size. I never had a woman not orgasm with me. So maybe work on your skills a little and have her work on her kegels.
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I think it's a stretch and a bit of a cop-out to say that it's her responsibility to work on her vagina to make it tighter. You wouldn't say it's anyone's responsibility to make their dick bigger would you? I doubt the idea has even popped into her head. I mentioned kegels and how I practice them to my girl and she said she could do them, but didn't ever think about practicing herself (and I still don't think she gets the point, which I'm not trying to push on her).
That said, it would be a nice and constructive thing for her to exercise, but it would take a wiser man than me to know how to break that to her. I feel like it might come off as vaguely hypocritical for a man seeking ultimate validation that his penis is perfect the way it is.
I completely understand the blow to the psyche this must be. I would be lying if I said that I would expect it to ever be struck fully from your mind. However, none of the feedback she's given you was unsolicited, and she never seemed to actually imply that you were not enough. You can say that she did so when you introduced the dildo, but that was just your takeaway from it. So no accusation should be levied against her mistreating the situation.
You said:
This, in my mind, tells all. If it can happen to you, it can happen to her. Like Jackie Treehorn said, the mind is the biggest erogenous zone. There are a number of reasons why sex might not be popping off for her. She is very young, and very inexperienced. She may have been, from the start, concerned with your pleasure and her performance -- and like a dog chasing it's tail you inevitably played into that, which in turn further diminished her ability to relax. My guess is that this is primarily mental. The dynamic between two healthy intimate individuals should be secure, open, and communicative. Obviously this is hard to achieve, but it's much easier surmounted than gaining two inches of girth.
The problem is that the dialog at this point, regarding the sex between you has probably already become so muddled that it will be difficult to have a blank slate to have an honest and open discussion on the matter. My advice is to listen to her body (and her voice, of course) while you're in the act, and slowly start to introduce exclusively positive dialog afterwards. For example, ask questions like "it seemed like you liked it when I did ____," rather than "did you feel anything when we did _____?" And let it seem natural, so as not to come off like you're putting pressure on her.
It may very well be that with the introduction of the dildo and other toys or techniques, she will "awaken" her sexuality, but my guess is that it's more about her comfort level with actually having sex with another human being.
That said, it would be a nice and constructive thing for her to exercise, but it would take a wiser man than me to know how to break that to her. I feel like it might come off as vaguely hypocritical for a man seeking ultimate validation that his penis is perfect the way it is.
I completely understand the blow to the psyche this must be. I would be lying if I said that I would expect it to ever be struck fully from your mind. However, none of the feedback she's given you was unsolicited, and she never seemed to actually imply that you were not enough. You can say that she did so when you introduced the dildo, but that was just your takeaway from it. So no accusation should be levied against her mistreating the situation.
You said:
This, in my mind, tells all. If it can happen to you, it can happen to her. Like Jackie Treehorn said, the mind is the biggest erogenous zone. There are a number of reasons why sex might not be popping off for her. She is very young, and very inexperienced. She may have been, from the start, concerned with your pleasure and her performance -- and like a dog chasing it's tail you inevitably played into that, which in turn further diminished her ability to relax. My guess is that this is primarily mental. The dynamic between two healthy intimate individuals should be secure, open, and communicative. Obviously this is hard to achieve, but it's much easier surmounted than gaining two inches of girth.
The problem is that the dialog at this point, regarding the sex between you has probably already become so muddled that it will be difficult to have a blank slate to have an honest and open discussion on the matter. My advice is to listen to her body (and her voice, of course) while you're in the act, and slowly start to introduce exclusively positive dialog afterwards. For example, ask questions like "it seemed like you liked it when I did ____," rather than "did you feel anything when we did _____?" And let it seem natural, so as not to come off like you're putting pressure on her.
It may very well be that with the introduction of the dildo and other toys or techniques, she will "awaken" her sexuality, but my guess is that it's more about her comfort level with actually having sex with another human being.
So she enjoyed a 9x7 dildo. So what? You can probably get to 8 long with PE and 6 girth shouldn't be out of reach either. Even though she enjoyed 7, I bet 6 would be good for her to. Work on your penis. As for your girl, easily taking a monster like that is not normal. She NEEDS to do kegels to tighten up down there. I think if you both are willing to work on this, things will get much better.
One thing that annoys me about stories like this is it always seems like the burden falls on the guy, in this situation there seems to be a bit of an incompatibility size-wise, but why does it seem like in every situation it's the guy's fault for not having an enormous dick? As others have said, you have an above average cock, so it is primarily her fault if there isn't much sensation during penetration. She should be the one posting on a female forum saying "my partner has an above average cock, but the sex isn't great, what should I do?". Sorry if that comes off as bitter, but I think it's only fair, you can do PE and try and get over the insecurities, and learn to be a better lover, but that's all you can really do, beyond that it's out of your control, and if you feel like the incompatibility is too much to overcome, then I guess you just move on, but be there for your daughter of course.
The thing that's a bit confusing to me is why didn't this come up within the first couple times having sex? Sexual compatibility is a big factor in relationships for me so if I felt like there was something amiss with penetrative sex early on with a partner I'd start discussing it then and there and see if we could arrive at a solution, and if not, I'd move on before we got too heavily invested in a relationship with each other.
The thing that's a bit confusing to me is why didn't this come up within the first couple times having sex? Sexual compatibility is a big factor in relationships for me so if I felt like there was something amiss with penetrative sex early on with a partner I'd start discussing it then and there and see if we could arrive at a solution, and if not, I'd move on before we got too heavily invested in a relationship with each other.
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Why is everyone looking for blame to put on people?
It's HIS fault because he wasn't born with a huge cock
No, it's HER fault for not kegelling, for not knowing her own body, etc
Guys, that isn't constructive. He has a baby on the way. He is probably planning his life with her.
We should be aiming towards constructive solutions to his problems, rather than tell him it's HER fault.
This is what I see when he gets it in his head it's her fault for liking a bigger dick: Resentment.
Which leads to a breakup.
Isn't the overall goal here to promote exclusivity between these two young lovers?
Keep doing PE. Over time, you'll be bigger than that dildo. Keep looking into ways to make the sex active and alive.
Work on your self esteem. Realize that people are built differently. There are methods to overcome this problem.
It's HIS fault because he wasn't born with a huge cock
No, it's HER fault for not kegelling, for not knowing her own body, etc
Guys, that isn't constructive. He has a baby on the way. He is probably planning his life with her.
We should be aiming towards constructive solutions to his problems, rather than tell him it's HER fault.
This is what I see when he gets it in his head it's her fault for liking a bigger dick: Resentment.
Which leads to a breakup.
Isn't the overall goal here to promote exclusivity between these two young lovers?
Keep doing PE. Over time, you'll be bigger than that dildo. Keep looking into ways to make the sex active and alive.
Work on your self esteem. Realize that people are built differently. There are methods to overcome this problem.
1 1/2 inches to spare is only 1/2 more than what you got buddy. Your cock would be plenty for most women mate. I bought my wife a rabbit, just to make sure she cums regular. I suffer from PE buts that another story I dont mind because to be honest a vaginal orgasm for most women is a rare event, I have accomplished it a few times, but mostly I come too soon! You could try the figure of 8 hip roll to stoke the sides of her inside. Dont take it personally , we are all different, and sex isnt the most important part of a relationship, just the fun bit, get it into perspective dont take it too seriously.
Mike
Mike
I know! It amazes me when someone who has a big dick and feels they're too small posts they get loads of helpful replies, but when it's someone with a small cock who posts they have a problem with being small they get sh*t, especially form bigger guys who somehow don't see a problem with being small but do see a problem with someone who is big thinking they're too small.
A dildo doesn't have a pulse, doesn't send her flowers, doesn't tell her how much it loves her. . . well, you get the idea.
This is truth. However, I want to point out I was not trying to start a fight lol.
My point is this is a troll or that woman has a massive, massive vagina. Like she birthed elephant babies. 7x5 is a big dick. Especially if he is talking NBP. The girth could be bigger sure but don't sneeze at 5 inches around. It is "above average."
And also, try having that 5 and then all of a sudden being like 4.75. That extra .25 inch fucking makes a difference.
Here's the thing with internalizing it. You just try to deal with it and get overzealous with training. he could very well break his penis because he feels like he'll never be enough for her and frantically is trying to get big enough to make her feel him.
problem with this is that it leads to an increased self loathing as well...
Many women here said that it's not the man's responsibility to make a girl cum, Only a girl can make herself cum. If she can't orgasm with penetration she needs to get in tune with her body to figure it out. Only thing he can do is facilitate an orgasm, the woman has to make herself able to orgasm. Only thing he can do is become more attentive, and more skillful. Paying attention to what she likes... but going by how much they have sex, i'm sure he's plenty attentive to her needs... even to the effect of buying a dildo.
Everyone's comments here are great, but the one person here who really hit the head on the nail is Toadstool. He's absolutely right about finding CONSTRUCTIVE solutions.
I05t, I know what you're going through. I know what it feels like to feel insufficient. To feel like helpless and alone. It all hurts. I know.
But you can do something about it.
There is nothing wrong with either you OR your girlfriend, like other people have said on here, you have an above average penis, you two simply have different builds.
Again, what are you going to do about it?
Here's what you're going to do: You're going to PE your ass off, read, learn, and ask questions. Then you're going to sit with your girlfriend, tell her you love her with all your heart, and introduce the idea of the Kegel. Kegels have so much benefit so explain to her that it will make sex a HELL of a lot better for both of you. She has nothing to lose and everything to gain.
If you want to marry this woman one day, then stay strong and FIGHT. Fight for your self esteem, your confidence, your happiness, it's all there: Find it. PE works my friend!! It's not a joke, it's not a waste of time, it's not a scam, IT, WORKS. This is just one obstacle in your life that will hinder your temporarily, but remember it for what it is; just an obstacle. You can make it if you work for it.
You can keep crying, you can keep typing for help, you can keep wasting your time.
Or.
You can get up and fight for whats rightly yours.
I wish you all the best.
I05t, I know what you're going through. I know what it feels like to feel insufficient. To feel like helpless and alone. It all hurts. I know.
But you can do something about it.
There is nothing wrong with either you OR your girlfriend, like other people have said on here, you have an above average penis, you two simply have different builds.
Again, what are you going to do about it?
Here's what you're going to do: You're going to PE your ass off, read, learn, and ask questions. Then you're going to sit with your girlfriend, tell her you love her with all your heart, and introduce the idea of the Kegel. Kegels have so much benefit so explain to her that it will make sex a HELL of a lot better for both of you. She has nothing to lose and everything to gain.
If you want to marry this woman one day, then stay strong and FIGHT. Fight for your self esteem, your confidence, your happiness, it's all there: Find it. PE works my friend!! It's not a joke, it's not a waste of time, it's not a scam, IT, WORKS. This is just one obstacle in your life that will hinder your temporarily, but remember it for what it is; just an obstacle. You can make it if you work for it.
You can keep crying, you can keep typing for help, you can keep wasting your time.
Or.
You can get up and fight for whats rightly yours.
I wish you all the best.
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That's a very good point. I didn't think of that
Lost could hurt himself, hoping for quicker results.
Hurting your penis could lead to worse problems like impotency or loss of sensation. It could lead to no growth at all, and I think I've seen a few posts of decreased length.
This is a very good read https://www.pegym.com/forums/success-forum/3777-my-success-story-frustrated-beginner-read.html
