is she playing me?

BULLDOG91

Registered
Well Done !
Joined
Aug 24, 2010
Messages
27
Reaction score
2
Points
0
Location
USA-midwest
i have been seeing this girl for awhile now.she flirts on the phone and in texts.and says she likes me and wants more than just friends. but heres the problem. she does this onley when she wants to.half the time she doesnt return calls or texts. and when i see her she always wants something.and i go along because im a nice guy.dont get me wrong i dont mind helping her out but im not getting anything back.i have told her i wanted more and the way she talks so does she.but she's onley talking and teasing my butt.i never had a lady do this before.it has become a challenge for me.does anybody have any ideas of how to turn this around. i'v even told her that im going to see other girls. poop or get off the pot i said.her actions dont match what she say she wants. i have done everything i can. i like her but she's waisting my time,money,feelings,and i really like her.what if i put her to the back of the pack for a short time. all ideas are welcome
 

BULLDOG91

Registered
Well Done !
Joined
Aug 24, 2010
Messages
27
Reaction score
2
Points
0
Location
USA-midwest
or do i just lick my wounds and move on.
 

TTBB

Senior Member
Well Done !
Joined
Sep 18, 2010
Messages
7,795
Reaction score
490
Points
0
With in what you wrote you are already answering your own question ..
she doesnt return calls or texts
when i see her she always wants something
im not getting anything back
she's waisting my time,money,feelings,
her actions dont match what she say she wants
She only wants you when its convenient to her..she is using you. regardless of what her real feelings are for you .. she is using you
lick your wounds and move on.
 

Knuckle Up

Registered
Well Done !
Joined
Jul 28, 2010
Messages
83
Reaction score
1
Points
0
You gon find all different types ofgirls, the chick you dealing with is what I would call a "Golddigger"...
 

Pegasus

Administrator, PE Gym Editor, PEGym Hero; ,
Staff member
Excellent !
Joined
Jul 15, 2009
Messages
44,253
Reaction score
1,178
Points
133
Hey it's easy enough, don't give her anything and see what happens.
 

vulcan

Retired Moderator, PE Gym Editor, PEGym Hero
Joined
Feb 28, 2010
Messages
2,672
Reaction score
126
Points
0
Location
United Kingdom
I agree with all of the others on this & using Pegasus's test might give you some insight on the subject - so that you can spot this kind of dynamic in the future & nip it in the bud.

See it solely as a lesson learnt.
 

BULLDOG91

Registered
Well Done !
Joined
Aug 24, 2010
Messages
27
Reaction score
2
Points
0
Location
USA-midwest
thanks to all for helping out.
 

mistydawn

Banned
Banned
Joined
Oct 26, 2010
Messages
1,649
Reaction score
108
Points
0
Location
USA
A major thing I learned back in my early 20's is do not give more than they do.
I learned that lesson the hard way. Match what they give. Right now you are giving
with no receiving. She just texts and stuff to keep you hooked.
 

GTO

Retired Moderator, PEGym Editor, PEGym Hero
Joined
May 21, 2010
Messages
5,449
Reaction score
165
Points
83
Location
Oh ... just around ...
A major thing I learned back in my early 20's is do not give more than they do.
I learned that lesson the hard way. Match what they give. Right now you are giving
with no receiving. She just texts and stuff to keep you hooked.

That's a double-edged sword, I think. You could miss out on sooo much the other person has to offer you if have that sort of attitude. I know it's a defense mechanism that helps us from getting hurt (I've been there), but at the same time, if both of you go into a relationship with that frame of mind, how would it ever grow? I know being hurt is bad, but the ramifications of doing this can make it a lot worse. If you're love only goes so far, how can it ever be called love?
 

MrBigDick

Retired Moderator, PEGym Hero
Joined
Jul 26, 2009
Messages
11,313
Reaction score
260
Points
0
Age
55
Location
Wherever I choose to be.....
Pure and simple, you're being played. I've had girls do this to me before. You cut them off and move on. If it isn't you, it'll be another guy that she will take advantage of as best she can, give little in return and do to him what she is currently doing to you. Cut her off brother and move on.
 

BULLDOG91

Registered
Well Done !
Joined
Aug 24, 2010
Messages
27
Reaction score
2
Points
0
Location
USA-midwest
i tryed to explain to her how life was a two way street. she didnt get it so i said be safe.she still didnt get it.i said fine i hope you get run over by a truck........goodby .thanks to you all
 

mistydawn

Banned
Banned
Joined
Oct 26, 2010
Messages
1,649
Reaction score
108
Points
0
Location
USA
That's a double-edged sword, I think. You could miss out on sooo much the other person has to offer you if have that sort of attitude. I know it's a defense mechanism that helps us from getting hurt (I've been there), but at the same time, if both of you go into a relationship with that frame of mind, how would it ever grow? I know being hurt is bad, but the ramifications of doing this can make it a lot worse. If you're love only goes so far, how can it ever be called love?

I have learned there needs to be an even exchange or else someone feels used. Someone is actually used. Love grows as you give a little more, and a little more. You cannot go around throwing your pearls to swines. People earn your trust and affection. I learned this from an ex-BF as well as Ayn Rand (a writer).
 

Pegasus

Administrator, PE Gym Editor, PEGym Hero; ,
Staff member
Excellent !
Joined
Jul 15, 2009
Messages
44,253
Reaction score
1,178
Points
133
Yes misty but you must also walk in their shoes a little, but you know that it is why you are here.