Vile Morning

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I had a really vile morning.
I squeezed out a hard-on this morning to some Inari Vachs, because I am weak willed. After that I was still rock solid, so I went downstairs and placed my daily supplements on the table. I chased those down with some apple juice. Then I grabbed a bowl of cereal and headed back upstairs.
In my room I watched Dollhouse on my laptop, while eating and checking my emails.
The erection was still there.
Near the ending of the episode I noticed a very unfamiliar feeling. I thought there was a volcanic eruption taking place in my stomach. I remember only having this feeling a few times, influenced twice from alcohol.

The first time I was late to a party. I was the reigning champion of "Three Shots, Three Cups." From what I have been told, I had a lot of challengers. I still hold my title to date. The other time, I drank a fifth of Jack Daniels like it was water. In fact I remember pouring it into cups of water. See, everyone knows your supposed to have a glass of water for every beer, so I planned on cutting out the middle man.

Once I realized what this reaction was, I calmly placed the Honey Nut Oats aside and the laptop next to it, then headed for the bathroom. I just stood over the bowl doubting this could really be happening. The volcano wanted to burst, but I forced it down. I closed my eyes and thought about how many times I have successfully done this before. I also thought about the three pounds I lost, as the doctor's scale proved; missing a meal or two does that for me. I can't afford to do this.
As I fought the force, sitting on my knees doing crunches towards and away from the bowl with my upper body, I remembered something my brother told me: "Don't worry about doing it, Bro. You feel good afterward."
So I leaned into the toilet and threw up twice. I didn't feel good afterward. And I lost my supplements for the day.
I did learn something today though: milk plus something acidic (apple juice) equals vomit.
 
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Keido

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Sorry to hear that, fig. Hopefully there won't be a repeat performance.
 

remek

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Throwing up: One of the worst feelings in the world. I can't disagree more with your brother. It feels like sh*t before, during and after. Either way, sorry to hear about the vile, figgy.
 

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Wow dude. You must be a writer. Very descriptive. Sorry to hear about all the vileness.
 

Going411x7

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Keep writing, pal. I've sat on the cold floor in front of the bowl for an hour, desperate to spew. I always chucked through my nose--bile--vile--thank God t's been a while. :)
 

ajy102075

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Nice write for sure. As quite the drinker I know what you feel. Try drinking jack at about 100*F and chasing it with milk. Thats pretty similar. Curds of milk and cheese with liquor....delicious!!! Nice post though man. Very creative.
 

W.M.P.

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Throwing up: One of the worst feelings in the world. I can't disagree more with your brother. It feels like sh*t before, during and after.

Exactly!...before, during AND after...there's just nothing good about throwing up. There might be a rush of feel-good neurotransmitters right after it happens but once those wear off, you feel like you got hit by a freaking truck. :sick:
 

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I think chain reaction barfs are the worst. Sitting in a car, cold, windows up, everyone is fucked up, guy in the back seat throws up a load and the smell sets off everyone else. Yuck!
 

Going411x7

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I remember our nephew projectile vomited Chinese all over our van. It stunk for months. I may barf this very minute.
 

kingpole

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I am the champion of barfers. A few years back the stupid doctor prescribed for me keflex for a skin rash that woukld not stop itching. The Keflex did not work. I itched all the more. Turned out it was a yeast i caught form the antibiotics i took for the many eye surgeries i had.

About a a week later i started having stomach problems and was downing rollaids like candy. Then about a month later i started puking 5-10 day. Soon my weight dropped from 185 lbs to 163 lbs. Kidney function was compromised lost 80% function in both kidneys. Got restless leg syndrome and Iron deficient anemia to boot. For lack of a better sentence i was dying. My calcium levels had risen to dangerous levels. Had to hospitalized four times in a single year. My hematcrit dropped from 14 to 9.

I barfed up everthing except my lungs for about a year 5-10 times per day.

A lesson in this is that antibiotics are nephro toxic and can temporailty cause your kidneys to shut down. There is no alopathic solutiuon to this malady. The only thnig that helps to defuse the dangerous effects of keflex is a broad profile of gensing. American, Korean, Russian and Siberian.