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Longroadahead

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Well, sitting here hating every passing moment of my dreadful f'd up life. Throughout my life everything has gone wrong...I feel like crying but the hate i feel inside stops me. I'm dead inside just need to die on the outside now.I have never had a girlfriend nor had sex, I am 22 years old (eyes just teared up writing that).I was diagnose with phimosis when i was 16 so i had a circumcision done. The size of my penis is just another one of my curses...it's pathetic.. it looks like a ten year olds... under two inches flacid and thin.... When I get an erection it has a bad arch to the left..... like.. at 9 ocklock. I dont know how i got stuck with this, my brother has a huge one, he always brags about it- and I often see it bulging when he wears sweatpants.He says he is just over 9 inches and i believe him... girls say he is too big to handle...I swear it's like something wants me dead... I cannot find a way out. I have alot of pride, i am a big man with a childs unit. This embaressing secret has kept me back from my entire life... I havent told anyone ... I cant speak to anyone... I strongly doubt i will be able to fix myself.I spend all day worrying and focusing on the size of my penis,,, its like there is no way out. My entire life has been goin downhill from drug addictions to u name it.Honestly the only thing keeping me alive is my family and the little bit of hope in this site . Seams like I only wake up to endure my day then go to sleep .... everyday.... all essence of joy and happiness are gone. There is a hell and Im in it.
 

kingpole

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Ok here is some love coming at you. Is you brother on drugs like you are?
 

Avenger

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First of all, welcome. If size is what you seek, then it seems you're in the right place. I am a newb myself.

As for no girlfriends and no sex....I'm 23 and never had a gf nor had sex. It's really out of religious conviction though--I'm going to wait till I'm married.

But there's way more to life than sex. The media will have us think otherwise, but f*ck the media.
 

Longroadahead

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I am not on drugs anymore. id kill u right now if i had the chance.
 

Longroadahead

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So this forum is supposed to be helpful? I spit my heart out and the MODERATOR sends me that remark? Doesnt care about my life it looks like and at this stage in my life neither do I. This mod is not a human beeing and i dont want to insult animals.
 

kingpole

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I am not on drugs anymore. id kill u right now if i had the chance.

And why would you do that?

Im glad your not on drugs, drugs make your dick small. Now you have a chance to grow a bigger one.
 

Longroadahead

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I cant take it anymore, shot me down with that comment... You see im at the end of my rope... I would never say all this in real life. My penis was that way even before drugs and i am on a two anti depressant medications already. I guess my emotions typed that for me... Just ignore this post im goin to go crawl into a hole its my problem I have to deal with it I guess... I just started typing what was on my mind....Im sorry
 

kingpole

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I cant take it anymore, shot me down with that comment... You see im at the end of my rope... I would never say all this in real life. My penis was that way even before drugs and i am on a two anti depressant medications already. I guess my emotions typed that for me... Just ignore this post im goin to go crawl into a hole its my problem I have to deal with it I guess... I just started typing what was on my mind....Im sorry

Thats ok. Were here to help!!!!!
Sorry if my approach was to harsh.
 

mason

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Mate you need to really get out of that mind frame life is WAY too short to think about that. So go see a councilor. For all ur PE needs you have come to the right place, this site has all u need to make ur junk into something more..... So mate cheer up and start to fix the problem
 

TinyMutantNinjaTurtle

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hey man im just starting jps routine tonight. im not very big myself and im 24 with only 3 girls under my belt. i KNOW how u feel. look i got some contact info in my Prof if u wanna talk abot it one on one your problem sounds similar to mine im a big guy with a mismatched unit. Its hell i know. Its caused me to wus out on some hot ass,but were here to help each other. Anyway since were both new maybe we could track our gains together or somethin, Not to sound gay LOL just tryin to help.

sorry grammar is my worst subject
 

RockofFox

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I cant take it anymore, shot me down with that comment... You see im at the end of my rope... I would never say all this in real life. My penis was that way even before drugs and i am on a two anti depressant medications already. I guess my emotions typed that for me... Just ignore this post im goin to go crawl into a hole its my problem I have to deal with it I guess... I just started typing what was on my mind....Im sorry

Longroadahead please listen to my advise and seek out some professional help. This is not me being a smart ass and stating the obvious, but the problem is this. We are not trained to deal with the most potent weapon that man has - the brain. Sometimes the way we use our brain is not helpful to ourselves as it could be. Seeking a professional, particularly in CBT, can help you realign your thought processes and give you something to believe in and something to aspire to.

That should be your very first step. With all due respect pe is not instantly going to fix the way you feel, you need time, and hope.

I hope this isnt what you've heard before but when you are in despair, often we need someone to put their arm around us and say "we can work through this". Thats the beauty of a good CBT therapist.

Regarding Kingpoles post, he is a honest, genuine and caring member who wrote his post with the best of intentions.
 

Longroadahead

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Thanks you all so much for your friendly help, I was really upset last night and I'm sorry my emotions got the best of me. Yes Kingpole and I got off on the wrong foot but I can see he is only looking to help, he even sent me two personal messages ;] (ty). I'll be back later tonight to do some research, feels like I got some weight off my shoulders for today.
 
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frb3

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Thanks you all so much for your friendly help, I was really upset last night and I'm sorry my emotions got the best of me. Yes Kingpole and I got off on the wrong foot but I can see he is only looking to help, he even sent me two personal messages ;] (ty). I'll be back later tonight to do some research, feels like I got some weight off my shoulders for today.

Mayhaps a more optimistic name would help also. Keep in mind the old Chinese Proverb: The longest journey starts with but a single step.

Additionally the advise of Pogo Possum (you are too young to remember Walt Kelly's creation): We has met the enemy and he is us.

Do not look for insults where none are intended.
 

6789876

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hey man, I totally identified with your post - had a huge heroin addiction until I was 25 (but would do anything if that was not available - and most of it was through self hatred and just being addictive. I've been clean and sober 22 years now and if you pm me I'd be happy to tell you how I did it and where you can go for the free help. It matters not just to stay off the drug but to let out the anger.

As for your penis. I identify with that to. For some reason that became a big part of how I defined my attractiveness. The curve will be cured by pe. Especially hanging will straighten it out over time and give you length. You can not only make your dick bigger but better looking through the same exercises. Also congratulations on talking about your issues with your dick, it's not easy to tell someone for the first time that you are small or hate the way your dick looks and how it makes you feel - that was so embarrassing for me that it was out of the question to let anybody in on it.

The good news about having an addictive personality is that you can put it to use in other ways - like pe. That's the number one reason I am so consistent in my program, once I have a routine it is harder for me to break it than keep going with it.

The dick can be fixed, made straighter and bigger - and you are young so the addiction and self hatred can be put behind you as well. Way better to do it now than when you are in your 40's.

Hope this helps! You are in the right place!
 

P.Nuzz

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Longroadahead I have also been treated for depression at times in my life. The last time I was on meds that actually made everything worse, I had thoughts of ending it all. I'd sit in a recliner and feel drained, mentally and physically, yet I couldn't sleep. Didn't have any interest in reading, T.V., conversations. I just wanted to close my eyes and make it all go away. What did I do? Something I probably shouldn't have without consulting a doctor but I did. I stopped taking my meds.

*Note* - I am NOT advocating that you or anyone else do that.

I gathered up all the anger and frustration I had in my mind and started to focus it. I kept thinking, "I am going to beat this sh*t, I will not be sucked down into nothingness. All the negative comments from people I've gotten, those people are the warped fucked up ones, not me. I never did anything to them. If they don't like me, they can suck it. I'll find reasons, make reasons, to keep going forward every day. I will not ever again feel the same as fucked up as I felt yesterday."

I had and still have at times the same problem with flaccid size. Way back in fifth grade our class took a trip to a swimming pool. I couldn't swim, had never been to a pool like that before. What I didn't know was that all the other guys in the class had pre-thought changing in the dressing room, and had swim shorts on under their pants. I was the one who ended up being naked while changing and of course, the pointing and the laughter brought me confusion. Like most human beings I assumed I was "normal" and didn't understand the reaction. After that day though word got around to the whole school that I was a freak show escapee. From that point on I slowly lost friends, immediately lost any chance at dates with any girls I knew(they had all been told). I had been an outgoing person until then. I became an introvert in every way. I cursed myself, my parents, God, the whole world. Before that day I had never known pure anger. Looking back now I realize that I was better able to understand movie villains from then on.

I locked myself in my room after school and played DOOM 2 for endless hours. It alleviated a lot of aggression. To those who think violent video games are pure evil I say this. Without that outlet of blasting away at virtual scum I might have one day ended up blasting away at living targets. My anger management now is so far ahead of what it was back then, I can load up DOOM 3 and play for a while, and get scared shitless by the violence instead of being totally absorbed.

Longroadahead I just want you to know that there is always a reason to keep going. Always some flicker of hope somewhere. It takes time to find but without a doubt it sure is worth finding.
 

KNEEMORE

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Longroadahead, I'm another one! I definitely can relate to how you are feeling, but I definitely don't know how well I can handle the situtations that are currently ahead of me. Being 21 and a virgin as well totally sucks! Hey, what can I say every fucking waking day of my life this has been my main focus. Penis size! I ask why me, and found nothing. But the key is inside you, it inside us all. I feel that I could have been in a much better place have I not blame everything on the size of my dick. I too, have self abuse my self with drugs just to try to get pleasure from some place since I wasn't getting any sex. But now that I have to join the military and face the fact of others seeing my small dick it has compelety crushed my self confidence. I know I did this sh*t to my self and responsibility lies soley in my hands. My life isn't worthless and hope is not too far away! The only reason why I chose to keep living is because my family! I know that if I done something stupid that the pain and suffering will be everlasting for them. Hold ya head, your not the only one!
 

kingpole

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Do you see the common thread here, Drugs, drugs make your dick smaller than it would normally be. Don't fish in city lakes, fish born in cities have small genitals or no genitals at all. Why, because so many drugs are flushed down the toilet. this gets into the rivers and streams. This proves that all medications are estrogenic and should only be takin for acute illnesses.

For chronic illneses you should look to herbs and supplements and changing your diet. Cod liver oil and fish oil are real good for depression. In the old days before mind drugs came on the scene they treated depression with cod liver oil. It worked just fine.

Now you guys got to stop the self hate thing as well! Nothing can shrink a dick up more than self hate, low self esteem and self abuse.

This is a good thread for airing out laundry and getting your thoughts and feelings out. As a Medical Asssitant im trained to jump to the cause. Find the answer to the cause and you eliminate the problems and many other issues that rise up from it.