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No improvements for me in 3 months having real sex. What do I do?

Meiretes22

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That's it.

I've been having sex with my girlfriend every 1-3 days. I only can last a bit if I have my penis inside her but without movements, if I start thrusting even if it's slowly, I feel the urge to cum.

I'm always in top so I have the "control", if she rides me I would just cum in literally 10 seconds.

I've been also doing a RK / edging routine for 1 month, no improvements.

The only way I have to last for a good time is when we wait after I cum and have sex for a second time. That's the only way where I can last for 30 minutes or more, she can ride me, I can thrust her hard, etc.. but that's not what I want.

She says it's not a problem, she likes our sex, she enjoys it a lot, but come on, we all know that it would be much better if we could have good sex in the first try and not waiting for the second time.

I've gone to the urologist, and he told me to do a blood analysis for testosterone and something else, the results were normal. He told me to use Pilligry (Dapoxetine) and use 1-2 pills 30 minutes before having sex.

I took 2 pills before having sex and they were effective, but that's not what I want. Each pill costs about 8€ and they're not a real solution, just a temporally fix. I don't want that either.

So, my question is : What do I do? If having real sex almost everyday for 3 months didn't help me, what will do? Am I condemned forever to be a fucking 20-seconds man?

I am so bored of this problem, I can't find a solution.

I'm a 21 years old man, I'm healthy, I'm going to the gym, I'm in good shape, good diet. No ED problems, just PE.

Tomorrow my girlfriend will go on vacations for 2 weeks,so no sex for me during that time. What different thing can I start doing?

The only thing left for me to try are supplements or surgery(if it exists). Is there any supplement useful for PE?
 
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Physdoc

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Since you've been seen by a doc and had blood tests, let's assume the doc was competent and ruled out medical issues. So, the challenge is likely more in your head. If you mastrubate, don't go for a quick over and done. That just conditions you to ejaculate fast. Some guys have luck with the squeeze method - when you're in her and feel close, pull out and squeeze yourself firmly near the glans until the feeling goes away. Repeat this if you get close too soon again. Or think about something nonsexual when in her. Neither of those are all that sensual, but can work.

There are also desensitizing oils or sprays for your penis. One brand available over the counter (at least in the US) is Promescent, it's also available on Amazon.com. And there are loads of others available online. These can work, but some guys don't tolerate it all that well and it can be transferred to her tissues and not be great for her. But probably worth a try as long as you're not allergic to any ingredients.

Anyway, it's in your head. The more you focus on the problem, the more it will be a problem. Good luck.
 

Meiretes22

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Some guys have luck with the squeeze method - when you're in her and feel close, pull out and squeeze yourself firmly near the glans until the feeling goes away. Repeat this if you get close too soon again.

This is not a solution, just a temporary fix like the pills. What's the point of doing that if I will have to stop every 20 seconds?
 

HangSolow

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This is not a solution, just a temporary fix like the pills. What's the point of doing that if I will have to stop every 20 seconds?

OP, I'm in the same boat you're in, but I'm 38. I happen to be on a medicine, that I can't do without, that cause premature ejaculation. I totally understand,; it's embarrassing. And especially so when you compare yourself to what you see in the porn movie. Because you are so young, that works against you, I believe. You are in the horniest years of your life. When you are having sex, don't trump it up in your mind like it's some mind blowing experience before it even is. Calming down mentally, was my biggest step in seeing longer intercourse.

Secondly, I started PE 5 weeks ago , approximately, and I have seen 1/4" erect length increase, as well as much harder (more plump) erections. I do 40 minute jelqs X 4, or 5 times per week. I've also lost 1/8" in girth. So, I decided to enroll, last night actually, into Big Al's program to see if i'm doing anything wrong, and to stream-line my PE process and cut out all the BS that I don't need to be doing, or am doing wrong, etc. No, I'm not a disguised PEGym moderator trying to sell Al's program. I'm desperate and frustrated just like you. However, I did see an increase in erect length, so I am motivated now. Also, my doctor prescribed me viagra, and I can last as long as I want during oral (I actually faked being near orgasm, so that I didn't hurt my wife's feelings. She was giving it her all for about 20-30 minutes), and I can last nearly as long as I want to during sex. I believe this is due to the viagra. Also, after viagra, I'm not exhausted after I orgasm. Often, I feel like continuing.

Thirdly, I think you should have your routine examined to make sure your giving enough time during PE and for recovery. Put your routine into words here, and see if others can help. Also, I bought one of those all-day extenders on the cheap, and I wear it as much as possible, even in public.

Lastly, you must not underestimate your mind and your psychology. It's easy to point to problems, dwell on them, and let them defeat you. Your feelings and confidence deserve to be treated by the utmost care by you. Learn to value your feelings to the point that you refuse to be frustrated. Believe me, I put on the under-confidence routine with my wife, seeking validation from her, and she didn't know how and why to respond because, in her mind, there was no problem. I became so insecure that when she tried to reassure me, I thought she was lying. Insecurity will mess with your mind, hardcore.
Try a different script from your doctor. Don't let him tell you viagra doesn't help with premature ejaculation. Yes, it's expensive, but a little goes a very loooong way.
I hope I have breathed some freshness to your situation. Stay motivated. Learn PE, results will come.
 
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Physdoc

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This is not a solution, just a temporary fix like the pills. What's the point of doing that if I will have to stop every 20 seconds?

Guys who say this helped them say that after repeating it, they go longer between times they have to pull out to squeeze - eventually not having to do it anymore. But if you have in your mind that nothing will work, you'll experience just that.
 

Physdoc

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I had another thought after my last post and thought I'd share my experience. I'd never had a PE issue over the years of good sex with several women, until I met HER. She was gorgeous, sexy bod, sensual and really into me and sex. I was doomed. First time we had sex, I didn't last long at all. Same as your girlfriend, she said she loved it. And she said it turned her on that she turned me on that much. But I was still bummed.

The next time together I did both things I mentioned before, plus another thing. First, I went down on her during foreplay until she had a good orgasm. That took the pressure off having the bring her to orgasm before I did during sex. After I was in her, I did the squeeze thing and thought about baseball or something. When I did the squeeze thing, I brushed the top of my hand on her clitoris so she probably thought I was stimulating her (instead of wringing my PE penis's neck!!) It worked. Then after we'd been having sex often for a week, or so, I got over the nerves and the PE was gone.

This exact thing happened a couple years later with another woman. She was smokin hot and for whatever reason just felt like a slice of heaven as soon as I slide in. I did the same thing I mentioned above and within a few times with her, was back to normal time to the big E.

Hope that helps.
 

Big Al

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Have you attempted to condition yourself to last longer in your first round? Using the techniques of the manual Stop and Start can be very effective when applied to intercourse or other sexual activities.

Not to play down your issue, but if you can easily obtain and maintain an erection after ejaculating the first time you can still perform. Some even like to get the first ejaculation out of the way so they can last much longer/have more control for the next session(s).
 

JamesMonroe

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I suggest edging with your partner if possible. Do the start and stop method with her. It will be amazing tantric sex and you will get used to lasting longer and longer during real sex.
 

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Great advice from everyone, but ask your doc if there are cheap SSRI's out there where you live. Where I'm at (In the US) they are dirt cheap, even without insurance. They all work the same. They helped me out with premature ejaculation also.
 

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If your issue is just sensitivity, I am having a great time with lidocaine.I just put a little on the head and sensitive skin just behind, wash it off afte about 10 minutes and it will feel like you have had about 4 beers without the other issues that can come from 4 beers!
 

Meiretes22

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I suggest edging with your partner if possible. Do the start and stop method with her. It will be amazing tantric sex and you will get used to lasting longer and longer during real sex.

Have you attempted to condition yourself to last longer in your first round? Using the techniques of the manual Stop and Start can be very effective when applied to intercourse or other sexual activities.

Not to play down your issue, but if you can easily obtain and maintain an erection after ejaculating the first time you can still perform. Some even like to get the first ejaculation out of the way so they can last much longer/have more control for the next session(s).

Thanks everyone for the answers, I couldn't login earlier.

My girlfriend is now on vacation for 2 weeks, so I have no sex partner, I will have to do it myself.

About the Start and stop method, I have 2 questions :

1 - Should I ejaculate at the end of the session or better not to?
2- For how long should I do the exercise? 1 hour?
3- I have a fl*eshlight, it would be better if I use it, right?
 
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Pegasus

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Start a progress thread onsite so we can see your routine . I don't know at all what sort of rk or edging routine you did if you had a progress thread I could see . There is also a host of other methodology onsite start from the stickies.
 

Big Al

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About the Start and stop method, I have 2 questions :

1 - Should I ejaculate at the end of the session or better not to?[/quopte]

Ejaculate after the sessions. make sure you're not engaging in any other form of ejaculation during this time (e.g.- frivolous masturbation).

2- For how long should I do the exercise? 1 hour?

The exercise can be performed for up to 20-25 minutes in most cases. You'll likely start with less time than this.

3- I have a fl*eshlight, it would be better if I use it, right?

The fleshlight should give you a more realistic feel.