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Newbie here with PE/ED. Where to start?

Anon3629

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I'm very happy to have found this forum and think it may have answers to my problems.
Short version:
Late 30s, happily married. Went through some depression a couple of years ago. Wife and I had infrequent sex (1-2x month) over the past while due to combination of things (my depression, young kids, etc).
I turned to masturbation as a crutch. Did it most days, and very quickly. Could finish in under a minute because I was doing it for the release, not pleasure. Definitely noticed becoming less aroused by it. Would finish with a 40-50% erection.
Things are more frequent with us now but I'm experience both ED and PRemature ejaculation. I can get hard when we start making out but lose it quickly during foreplay. So we've basically been finishing each other orally/manually. I still get morning wood etc.
This weekend, got hard enough to penetrate and finished in like 20 seconds. This have NEVER been an issue for me before. I'd always finish way after her.
I started doing some kegels and have noticed that I always feel on the verge of ejaculating, even when flaccid. Like I know that right now, if she were to grab me or whatever, I'd be seconds away. Hard to describe but I'm basically just walking around flaccid but with a super sensitive penis?

Anyway, this place looks like a wealth of info but I'm overwhelmed and have no idea where to start. Thanks!