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Curing Premature Ejaculation- My Story So Far

Cantona7

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I have been PEing for a about two months now, but my focus entirely shifted from the size to this condition I have. We'd all agree size matters but what you do with what you have matters even more. Lasting long is one of the things you need to have to be a great lover. I realized that I was suffering from it and thought I'd start a log to keep myself motivated and at the same time help people who have similar circumstances. I have been edging for a little over a month now and I honestly don't know if I have made any progress. I have been talking to some experienced members on the forum who have successfully tackled this problem. Minuteman has been a great inspiration, and in fact, is the one who advised me to start a log as it helps a lot. I hope this log is helpful to other members and please feel free to add to it whether it is a genuine concern, an advise, or something inspirational. I am well aware of the fact that it is not something that happens quick, so I am giving myself 7-8 months to notice some progress, but I am really hoping my efforts pay off.
 
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Cantona7

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Below is my conversation history on this particular subject, thought it'd be helpful.
Hello Sir,
I am Cris, 21 years old, with very minimum experience with sex. I have recently realized that I suffer from Pre E badly. Last time I got a blowjob, I lasted literally just 30 secs. This worries me a lot and has undesired affects on my education, work, and social life in general as I seem to think about it a lot through out the day. I am very competitive person and try to give everything my 100%. I am gonna get married to my current gf next summer. I've had sex three times and then she had to move back to Cali. Needless to say, I sucked at it each time. I LOVE her to death and want to be an ideal partner, and I believe good sex among other things is a key to a healthy relationship/marriage. I don't want to ruin it just because I'm not good in bed. She is very understanding of my condition, but I noticed some frustration last time we had it. Also, I am always thinking she might be cheating on me there and all other stuff. I am emotionally very sensitive.
I am doing JP90 now, but my focus has entirely shifted to this part of my sexuality. She is very happy with my size but not the performance. I see your named mentioned a lot in Pre E forum, and I have read almost every single word you have posted. Your progress is rather impressive. I am at a point where you were two years ago, and I really want to replicate your success. I am very patient and determined. I know I have this condition and I am ready to commit to a routine to overcome it.
The reason I pm'd you is that I am seeking some advice. I have gotten a general idea how to go about it, but I still have some concerns and questions. I would really appreciate if you can take some time and reply back. I know it is gonna be a long message (sowwwiiieeeee)
I have been at edging two weeks now-- this is what I currently do:
-with no distractions- get an erection physically stimulating it.
-for 10 mins I stroke my shaft (no glan stimulation)
-for next 20-25 mins I only stimulate my glans, 5-7 PONRs and ejaculate at the end.
Do you think I should stick with it or I need to make changes? I just can't help but cum at the end of every session. I am trying to change that though. I also think I should start stimulating my glans right away because that's what happens when you have sex. What do you think about that? The only reason I don't do it because I don't wanna rush to my first PONR. Seems logical but then again its not the ideal way to train.
I have been trying to get a DO, but don't have a clue what it is and how to do it? I have been able to successfully hold my ejaculation off using strong kegel. I also want to ask you if I should use a regular kegel or a reverse kegel to hold it off? Also, when people say reverse kegling way before your PONR, does it mean while you are stroking it or getting your hands off and then doing it? Because if I do a rev kegel while holding my penis, it seems to make me hornier, weird, huh?
Sometimes my sessions last over an hour because I try to have 5 min. difference between two consecutive PONRs, and I usually have 6 or 7. Is it too long? because some people here only edge for 20 to 40 mins and still seem to make better progress than I am :(
How many days a week should I edge? currently I edge 4-5 times.
How long before I see any results? I know its a long term thing and I am very patient. I am gonna go visit her in August before my classes start, and we'll have sex (I am hoping). I really want to impress her and want to feel like a man. I hope you understand what I am trying to say here because this is how I really feel about it.
Anyways, I dont watch any porn now, have had my fair share of it and don't like the damage it has done. I hope you give me a good advice. Please write me a line or two if you don't feel like writing a whole big thing.
Thank You in advance!
you have a good one
Sincerely,
Cris


Hi cris_jos,

I'm 27 years old and still a virgin so as always take my advices with a grain of salt but it seems that I have somewhat innate understanding of these things so following my advice might not be bad.

First of all tank you for politeness. I have no problem reading long letters and since your is well formed (both in paragraph structure and politeness) so it is even easier.

Now, the very first thing I recommend to people asking me for advice is to open up their log in the premature ejaculation forum, as you have seen in my case that helps tremendously.

We have a tendency to overcomplicate matters and to use out brains far to much that most of the times makes us out of synch with out body and as you know that desynch doesn't help our condition.

Masturbation, edging and even sex is a very simple thing but understanding that takes time. Before you can understand that you must start and try to undersand yourself.

I always say that observation is really the bigest asset that you have. From observation comes understanding and with understanding you eliminate the unknown factors, for me those unknown factors where also the source of my frustrations with premature ejaculation.

So in order to keep this message short I am going go straight to recommendation.

The very first thing you need to know is not to do many thing at once, concentrate on one thing at a time until you are confitable with it and build up upon it.

The very first thing you need to do is to understand your arousal and in order to do that you have to be under it for extended periods of time.

So how to do that? Well first of all from now on you will ejaculate ONCE every three days.

DAY 1:

On the first day you will start slowly don't attack your penis at once get private and get naked and try to feel your body don't thing any extra sexual thought try to learn from touch, caress yourself but don't jerk of just let your penis slowly get fully erect with ocasional thug and stuff. If you lack proper arousal watch a short porn clip but don't do anything just accept the hornyness.

This sounds silly I know, caressing your body and stuff but you NEED to understand how your body reacts to both sexual and non sexual stimulation.

Now that you are fully erect just SLOOOOOOOOOWLY edge until ponr, don't think about anything neither good nor bad just try to bask in sensations, see where they come from and where they go, see how your breathing changes. When you get near ponr, and I mean VERY NEAR stop all movement and stand still, breath deep but not hard, close your eyes and feel it all over your body. In many first tries this is going to be hard, since you will ejaculate, if that happens try to enjoy it and try the same thing again tomorrow.

Now once you are at ponr and you really felt it, stop. Don't return to edging just stop. Lay down on the bed, or get your clotes and go out, anything but do not continue.

The only excuse for ejaculation in the treed day method is when you actually get blue balls (very rare) in other words your balls and starts to hurt, then you should ejaculate in other to alleviate the pain.

You can try to edge once again later on during a day but whatever you do ejaculation is not an option.

DAY 2:

Start the process in the same way that you did yesterday, but now given that you have not ejaculated you will(should) feel extra horny, but agan DO NOT RUSH. Take your time let it go full erected before any serious edging. Remmember, your goal now is to feel your body, you DO NOT CARE HOW LONG YOU LAST and to enjoy as much as you can. Play around, experiment, change positions frequently try stuff. When you come to ponr, again like last time, stop and just observe. After your ponr subsides and you penis goes a little limpish slowly continue again. Repeat as many times as you like BUT DO NOT EJACULATE.

People look down upon pleasure enjoyment during edging sessions seeing them as some sort of enemy the cause that makes them ejaculate early, but that is not the case. Most of the time you ejaculate because you are not horny enough, because your brain still think instead of focusing on sensations.

DAY 3:

By this day you should be feeling very... well you will see.

This is the 'field day' this the day where you can ejaculate and do it in any way you want. You can do it like yeasterday slowly experiencing it, you can just mastubate, whatever.

The point of this day is to ejaculate and give yourself and your body some down time.

After this you can do the 3 day again the next day or pause it is up to you.

The point off all this is to dissasociate ejaculation with orgasms and ejaculation with pleasure, most people have a hard time understanding that it isn't your ejaculation that brings orgasm it is most of the time the other way around. Ejaculation in essence is just that, ejaculation, and you might even notice it when you during some masturbation just ejaculated but felt nothing... terrible experience.

So for now, if you want to follow my advice, throw all the kegels, minutes and stuff out and just focus on this, you should do for about two weeks or more.

Also don't expect anything just enjoy the ride.

This brings us to sex and how all this connects.

The biggest frend of any premature ejaculation person is gradualness, that is why i told you to do it slow. Also in sex, make it slow, be sure to give her a lot of foreplay, be gradual. Tease yourself and her, don't just plunge into her, let your penis stay very hard for a while. Insert your penis into her and just make out with her, let your penis feel the warmth and try to get used to it, you are having sex there is no need to rush, she knows that you have premature ejaculate, she understands so anything you do better will only help her and reassure her of your progress. Let her teach you how to give her oral. Avoid missionary positions since they are hard for people with premature ejaculation at least in the beginning, try to do her doggy style or her on top of you.

Always be aware of your breathing and your state of mind during edging, don't think negative thoughts but don't thing to much positive thought, work on that your mind is mostly empty (this is really hard... but very possible and effective). Deep breaths help much. Also a part of your body will almost always tense up, try to notice what part is it and relax it. There are all "little things" but they build up on one another and their returns later on are much more than you think.

Solutions to premature ejaculation are simple ones, but most of the time out overanalytical mind desires it be something more complicating, but it takes time to really understand this.

Well for now that is it, try it out see how it goes, open a log and post your experiences, create a solid foundation and progress will be easy.

Good luck.

Hey Minuteman,
Thanks for the timely reply first of all. Yes the politeness is a must, especially when you are the one seeking help. I did exactly what you wanted me to do. I just got done with my "Day 3" session. I have seen some changes like my body is not as tensed, my pelvic floor is kinda relaxed but not as much as I'd like, tend to breath in and out very smooth. So these are all positive things. I have been edging 2 weeks and trying to do above mentioned things as they are mentioned ever so often on the forum. I have also noticed that I do not kegel involuntarily that much, and the intensity has gone down as well. It is probably because I am always conscious of them at work and other places. I try to keep a very light reverse kegel to counter them. I am also on reverse kegel only routine which is one day off and one day on. I do 30 5 sec holds. I would like some advice on that as well. I am thinking of quick clenches and 10 secs holds. How did you start your routine and how would I know when my pelvic floor is balanced?

I also want to mentioned that I did not ejaculate, today I was playing too close to it so i kinda went over the edge but a super kegel saved the day and I only let a very very minimum amount dribble out. I felt good that i was able to do that! :) I also noticed that once I reach the PONR, second one is just around the corner. This could be real frustrating during sex, don't you think? like having to stop every 10-15 secs?

I will start a log either tonight or tomorrow. I know it helps a great deal as in your case. I am really hoping the solutions are easy and understandable. Also, I do tend to over-complicate matters when it is not the way to go. I will work on that for sure.

How can the mind be totally empty and you still have an rock hard erection? May be its possible but I didn't think any negative thoughts such as me performing bad, but I had to think about my gf a few times to make edging...umm interesting, idk hehe.

On a personal note, Its amazing you are still a virgin. I say that with all the respect because I am assuming you are saving it for somebody special:) God will bless you:)
Regards,
Cris

I am one of those people that find rks almost ineffective so my first routine was mostly kegels. But what ever you do I would suggest having a balanced routine of both kegels reverse kegels (and even add root locks and reverse root locks), be sure to start small and generally prefer holds over flexes. Flexes are good but holds, i think are better for us, having a little bit of everything is a way to go, but don't rush no need to have a 100 kegel flex routine, it is more important that you are consistent in doing them.


So for example a total beginner would do something like this.

10 kegel flexes
10 reverse kegel flexes
10 root lock flexes
10 reverse root lock flexes

2 5 second kegel holds
2 5 second reverse kegel holds
2 5 second root lock holds
2 5 second reverse root lock holds

Start small, be consistent, after a week or even two make it double, but once you get to 50 or 100, don't up it there is really no point, since you will get diminishing returns, then either stay on that level (totally recommended and ok) or try out some exercises from the link in my signature. Towel rases later on are a good send for erection quality but that is really later on, be patient.

Rushing into new stuff and more stuff is like premature ejaculation it is the same wrong mindset, keep that in mind. Slowly build foundations.


As for how to know that your pelvic floor is balanced Confusion with Reverse Kegels here is a solid answer.

Once you trained yourself enough you won't need to stop but rather slow down, just be patient and learn not to ejaculate, do this 3day routine for two weeks minimum or so and you will see even more changes. Remmeber, fixing this ain't done I a week. Be diligent and understand that it is very important NOT TO EJACULATE, learn to control it as a conscious desire, as you start unconscious parts will follow.

Erection, as you will learn over time has nothing to do with thought, once you are erect (as you will notice as your edging sessions get longer) is that you simply stay hard on instinct. Once you learn to enjoy the sensation itself more you will understand also remmeber that imagination must give in to sensations as time pases in your edging routine.

They are easy, you will even comment on yourself something along the lines "how the heck was I so stupid not to see something so logical and natural", I know I did, once you do an entire new doors will open in your sex life.

Hey,
Thanks for outlining the routine. I based mine off of that:). I have been doing edging as you recommended, and I got few concerns and questions. I would love if you can interpret some of my experiences and give me a little insight. Following are the few things I have been observing/feeling of late:
1. The whole body tenses up whenever there is a sexual stimulation, especially the pelvic floor region. I have been able to to relax my body using breathing techniques and my pelvic floor is A LOT more relaxed, but i still feel some "weight" like something is there. It is not allowing me to have the sensation of fully relaxed pelvic floor. As you might know I have been on a reverse kegel routine and I consciously counter them through out the day, the latter has worked wonders.
2. Today was my day 2 of the second round of that routine. I was really relaxed, both my mind and body. I tried not to think anything (neither positive nor negative and nothing sex related). And to my surprise, I was able to have an erection for over 45 mins, it never went down significantly and my imagination was barely at work the whole time. As a result I could not reach my first PONR until 45 mins into it, and I also included heavy glan stimulation. But on the flip side, I just knew it was around the corner. Like if I wanted I could have come at will. I could literally guess the number of strokes it'd take me to cum. For instance, If I were to start now, I just know it'd take me 15 strokes to cum. I might be a stroke or two off, but yeah. What is it? Did you ever have that feeling or do you still have it? Sorry If my description of it wasn't sufficient, I just don't know how to explain it. It is like knowing you can cum in 4-5 strokes but you are CONSCIOUSLY doing the opposite, which is delaying it for as long as you can.
3. Could anybody attain such a level where he can cum at his will? Whether it be 2 minutes into sex, 10,15, 45, 2 hours? Is that plausible at all or would be it something against our natural ejaculatory instinct?
4. I have learned you need to master both the timing and have a good kegel strength to successfully have a clean DO. Remember the other day I told you when I had a partial ejaculation. It was then that I realized may be my kegel needs a bit of work too, as I had supposed it'd be strong enough since I have Pre E. But could it be my timing? Could it be that my kegel strength is adequate but my timing is not perfect? I am not jumping onto them but I just wanted to clear this up so I can prepare for them. I am planning on attempting DOs may be a month from now or 3 weeks.
5. Is amateur porn as dangerous as real porn? I am kinda feeling bad as I watched one today, its because I had been away from it for so long, but the feeling suddenly crept on me.
6. Should I play around being close/very close to the PONR? It is something a lot of members of our club do, and they say its a good way to get the penis get used to the sensations. what's your take on it? Should I just let the sensation subside completely before I start the next round?

That's pretty much it for now. I will keep you updated if I feel something new. I am hoping you can relate to most of the above mentioned stuff.
Thank You :)
Cris

1. I think the full relaxed feeling will come with time, sometimes not paying to much attention to that part can also help.

2. That is happening because you are getting used to high arousal, I also know how much more strokes till I come, I noticed that changing your position helps in making that number bigger (to the point that you don't know how much until ejac). This is you getting more in tune with your body. But be careful, for several reasons. First one is that it can be a double edged sword since if you know that you are one or two strokes away from PONR it might actually provoke you into ejaculation (I mean, I guess it can be easy solo, but when you are having sex with some sexy girl that just screams for you... well you get the point), so learn to accept that information as a matter of fact rather in a way neutral. Other pitfall is later on when you become much more reliable to that indicator, it can sometimes be wrong and trow you of the game. So it is a powerful tool but try not to make it the most important one. Also sometimes this can work in a oposite way, if for some reason your mind think that you have 5 strokes to go, you will have 5 strokes to go, even though that might not even be true.

3. It is possible and on many occasions I was able to do just that, spend a lot of your time near PONR and you will be able to ne there for long strokes of time. It requires much discipline and no sudden movements (depending on just how close you are) but it is one of the ways I first experienced soft wave orgazms. Sometimes you can form that state of always near PONR (after some time) fall in the zone where you get all the pleasure and none of the PreE problems, those are soft wave orgasms.

The "problem" when you are in the zone is that you have to try really hard to ejaculate. I wish, when if ever I have sex, that I would be able to at least once have soft wave orgasms while having sex. Then you can pound away with no problems, and what is even better your every thrust is orgasmic, it is beyond words in solo, i can't even begin to image it in sex.

But as I told it requires a lot of discipline to be able to stay near PONR long enough to do all that. But that is why edging is so useful for those who try.

My first soft wave orgasms where I think during one of my 3-day routines since you are aroused all the time, so the probability that it will happen to you if you keep at this is big.

4. Read this post and the links DO Veterans. Is my timing off or is my kegel not strong enough?

5. I can tell you form personal experience that in the later game, porn is only going to hurt your progress. Uses of porn are very limited.

6. See 3. But you should have variety. Sometimes go for control, somethinges play with yourself, sometimes tease yourself, sometimes just plain ejaculate. Variety is what is making your progress faster. Do different stuff while edging.

On a somewhat related note I noticed that you still haven't opened up a log. I don't mind answering you in private, but I think that both your questions and progress and my answers can contribute to other people as well. And it spares me the act of repeated actions, where I can just refer to a well formed answer and post and not type all this again.

It is somewhat a pitty that both your good questions and my answers can't help somebody else since they are not in the public view.

So do make your log and it would be good if our future conversations can occur in that topic, for the benefit of many.

Also, in no disire to force you to read or anything, but many of the things that could somewhat help you are in this topic "From PE to MMO"- Minuteman's Orgasmic log it is not a small topic but reading it will provide you with some insight and even answers to many questions you will ask in future.


Good luck.
 
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Cantona7

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Okay so tonight I edged with some intent. It was my first day of Arousal Control Program. I have come to conclusion that my Pre E is mostly mental so decided to give this program a shot. Tonight's session:
First PONR: 33 mins
Second PONR: 42 mins
Third PONR: 53 mins
What I did?
I edged with lube and got an erection solely from physical stimulation. My penis took its time but eventually got hard (a brief erotic thought might have helped) but my goal was to get hard with an empty mind (free of positive as well as negative thoughts) It was recommended to me by Minuteman.
Physical Symptoms I noticed: Abs and stomach would tense up occasionally, triceps (surprisingly) and my forearm would also do the same, neck region also tensed up but only twice. My legs and pelvic region was really calm and relaxed (may be because I was laying on my back?) I tried to breath deep throughout and did pretty good for my first day. I had to occasionally remind myself of it though.
My arousal level stayed very low.
Questions:
1. It seemed that when I would breath out my abdominal region along with my arms would tense up, how are you supposed to keep it relaxed and breath deep at the same time?
2. After my first PONR I really felt I could go as long as I wanted, but I noticed one thing that sent my arousal level from 5 to 9 on two occasions that was pulling my foreskin back (I am uncut). I was trying slow strokes and when I pulled it further back than I normally do, it sent my arousal level up like crazy. Any thoughts on that? In fact, it was the reason I reached PONR second and the third time.
3. I was able to kegel off second ejaculation, but reverse kegel done after the sensation had subsided caused a yellowish cum drop to dribble out. I did the same with the third ejaculation but my kegel was not strong enough on this occasion which resulted in a drop or two to dribble out. I also noticed a drop slowly come out as I was pulling my pants up. Is this gonna be considered an ejaculation?( :( if yes, its a disappointment because I just had a full orgasm yesterday and wanted to go at least 3 days without any kind of ejaculation) I didn't go flaccid right away, I am sure I could have gotten it as hard as it gets and continued with it, but decided not to.
4. To my fellow PErs, How do you guys edge? Do you have an erotic story going on in your mind all the time? It was really hard for me to concentrate and remember to breath deep, keep my body relaxed,etc and still imagine something hot. I must my admit whenever I was able to do it, it sure bumped my arousal level. I know it helps to edge with imagining stuff, but how do you do all that at the same time?
5. When people say they had their first PONR at 6 mins or so, do you guys try your best to reach it or to delay it? I'd take me 45 mins to reach my first PONR with glan only stimulation but with distractions (texting, chatting, etc) Today I didn't even turn the light on, it still took me over 30 mins. My penis didn't really feel anything.
6. I tried balloning when close to the PONR, and i placed a finger right b/w my testes and anus to feel the involuntary kegel. I didn't have a whole lot of them. In fact, just had 2 or 3 that were very very close to PONR while i was stimulating the area right below the head (very sensitive). Are they natural or should I try to counter them? I really thought they had to happen to push the semen up.
I am kinda frustrated about not knowing how to edge properly. Because if I suffer from Pre E. i should reach my first PONR a lot quicker. ugghh. I will figure it out tomorrow.
 

Minuteman

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Positive and negative thoughts: This will come by itself with time as long as your imagination is giving its way to sensations during a progression of the session, so for now there is no harm using imagination to get you hard or to keep you going, as long as when you are already horny and enjoying your imagination is less and less and you focus on the sensations more and more. In time you will be able just to go strait to sensations.

PIs: You have done a great work of observing your body and relaxing the parts that are tense, in this compartment you have no problem. Keep at it. For now find your confort zone (for me is also laying on my back, legs slightly bend and relaxed), but after a while you will have to try out other positions as well.

Answers:

1. Try to breath out more naturally and with less force. In time you will get used to it.

2. Since I am uncut also, for me when I pull my foreskin forward I will immediately drop out of my zone and straight to PONR, it happened before in the same way your's is now. My sugesstion is that for the next several sessions your just avoid that movement for now. Later on (on for example a 5-6 session from this) when you have been edging for at least 20-30 minutes (and you are properly aroused) try doing that motion slowly and ease up in it, take as much time as you want to get the effect of but then do another same motion and from that point till another PONR continue with that motion, during that motion you will feel even more arousal and sensation pleasure, the trick here is to accept that pleasure and counsciously to spread it all over your body. Also read about tension dispersion here https://www.pegym.com/forums/premat...mmo-minutemans-orgasmic-log-6.html#post461043

Also this is how I did overcame a similar this that you now experience
First one I noticed is that (I'm uncircumcised ) if I lift my foreskin so that it envelopes my glans and tug it up a little (a motion I do in order to spread pre-cum evenly so that there is not discomfort while stroking) I will immediately drop out of the zone and go very near PONR (like 2-3 strokes away), but given how aroused I am during that If I just leave it for 10 seconds or so and then start stroking shallowly near the base while rocking my pelvic slowly back and forth I am able most of the time to go back in it, anything other than that (if of course it doesn't last to long) will not make me go out of it, even stopping for a 5-10 seconds.

During that I started to understand that for some reason that is some sort of reflex (actually more of a habbit of mine) than something that is fixed. And over time during that sessions (a hour is a lot of time to adapt) I managed to learn how to override that by using that high arousal and pleasure and repeating that action very slowly over and over. Of course it is not 100% but it is close enough.

3. Stopping the ejaculation with a kegel hold is generally a Dry Orgasm attempt. For now I would recommend you not to do it unless you feel extremely confident about it since it puts a lot of strain on your body that can result in an injury. IT IS OK to use your kegel hold to ward of ejaculation, but if you see that you are in the process of ejaculating LET YOUR KEGEL HOLD GO and ejaculate. For now don't attempt any DOs unless you really think you can do it.

4. With edging is like with everything you do allot in time most of the thing will move into an unconscious part of your mind so you will have and idle mind. For example Sora here is able to shut his involuntaries down by reverse kegeling at the right time without thought. The post in question https://www.pegym.com/forums/premature-ejaculation-forum/42708-soras-log.html#post494369


5. Indeed sometimes my PONR will come right away uninvited, that depends on many things and most of the work here is working to be able to recover from that PONR and not ejaculate. Also deppends on how you edge. I always go full strokes from the beginning to the end. Since you are only simulating glans (and I guess with your foreskin) your ponr does not come as fast. And you should keep at what you are doing for now, but as you advance spend less time just simulating glans and more time having full strokes.

6. Some involuntary kegels are natural (like those that make you ejaculate, and shoot sperm) some of them are bad habbits and reflexes. Here is a little about them https://www.pegym.com/forums/premat...mmo-minutemans-orgasmic-log-6.html#post493605

In conclusion: Your progress is good, there is no edging properly, edging is masturbation with a specific goal in mind aside from ejaculation. Do not try to emulate others, you have your own way and your own pace and that is good. You will progress naturally and come to the same thing in any way. For the next 2 weeks or so just focus on the 3day-routine keep observing and what is most important keep enjoying. The more you consciously relax yourself the more will your unconscious in time take over it. Don't rush it, you have an excellent start.
 

steveshorny1

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Great info here. I swear this site just has too much info sometimes. i enjoy reading coments like these and learning what works for others.

Keep up the good work Cris
 

Cantona7

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Thanks Steve^^ :)
Just got done with my session. I am a bit disappointed because I ejaculated. I was planning on doing it tomorrow, but got too close the third time. I think I could have kegeled it off, but didn't bother trying it. Just enjoyed the moment thoroughly.
Stats:
First PONR: 23 mins
Second PONR: 33 mins
Third PONR: 42 mins (ejaculation)
Layed on my back throughout the session, I was able to keep my legs and pelvic floor very relaxed. I noticed some tension in arms and ab region but countered it whenever it got my attention. I didn't attempt a DO tonight. It was start/stop with balloning very close to the PONR. My session mostly consisted of glan stimulation as it'd have taken me even longer to reach PONR if it were full strokes.
Questions:

Which one of breathing in or breathing out plays with your arousal level?
I tried breathing out more naturally, but occasionally I'd would take a deep breath in and out. I noticed one of those two bumped up my arousal level and sent me close to PONR, was unable to specify which one it was though.

I was well out of my zone breathing good, relaxed, and imagining stuff. Suddenly in my imagination I pictured and heard my gf say "Yeah baby yeah", this sent me to PONR almost instantly. This is very weird because I thought I was very far off. Is it a good thing while edging or should I avoid it? I think I can definitely edge for as long as I want with an empty mind. But when something like this^^ comes up in my mind, I feel have no control. It is not even real sex, just a fringe of imagination based off of real experience. Does this prove my Pre E is mostly, if not totally, mental? Personally, I believe its all about over-arousal. Do I need a different approach if that is the case?


I think I can have two kinds of imaginations when it comes down to sex--wild ones (very possible and everyday stuff in bed) and mild ones (modified to not send me out of the zone). Should I work with the latter as of now?

It is advised that over time sensations should take over imagination while edging. Does this mean my ultimate goal is to edge with rock hard erection without imagining stuff and just concentrating on the sensations (the touch)? I can definitely do that now, but I think it'd be not as useful because edging with imagination is closer to the real experience than without. I could be wrong here, but definitely wanna clear that up.

It is the thing I noticed both yesterday (no ejaculation) and today (ejaculation). I seem to tense up my pelvic floor after I am over with my session. Yesterday I went to bed right away, and my pelvic floor was more tense than it was during the session. I'd also notice similar thing after attempting DOs and wrapping up the session. Is this something natural or should I hold a light reverse kegel to counter it consciously for as long as I can?

I also discovered my glans are hypersensitive. (thanks to being uncut) It is the reason when I pull my skin back, it sends me out of the zone instantly. I was wondering if there are any known exercises to decrease their sensitivity or would that be a wrong step?
Thanks:)
 
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Minuteman

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Tension: I think it might be different with people but in general I noticed that breathing IN causes the tension do evenly go trough your body and not just the pelvic floor while breathing out lowers/disperses the tension. When breathing out try to breath out like a machine is shutting down in somewhat exaggerated downwards motion, that helps me allot in keeping me away from ponr.

Imagination: Learning to deal with that should come a little bit later for now focus should still just be on observation and ejaculating every third day.

Mental PremE: Honestly PE is almost always a mix of physical and psychological, and any progress you make in either field will affect both. You will understand when you progress enough.

Imagination giving way to sensation: The idea is to edge long enough and to allow the imagination simply to slip away since you are so focused on sensations (highly pleasurable) that you are having. That is why it is important to have longer sessions and that why high-arousal in sessions is also important.

Uncut: I am uncut to and I have had oversensitive glans and I used to get straight to ponr when I pull my skin all the way back, that is why edging is so useful you simply get used to it, and when you are having longer sessions your erection also increases and your glans become much less sensitive. Also pevic floor routine makes your erection stronger so you are even less sensitive (in that negative way, the good feeling remains and you get used to that in time). Always have at least a bit of slow full strokes during the edging session and not just glans stimulation.

As I told several times, people with premature ejaculation are mostly both over analytical and impatient, it is in our nature. As before my advice to you is to keep more discipline and continue with your 3day routine until you can pull of at least 4-5 repetitions of it without accidents (of course you are free do decide that for yourself). Also most questions will answer themselves in time by your own observation of your progress, not that I mind the questions ask at all.

Also it is very good that you enjoyed the "out-of-schedule" ejaculation, that is a proper mindset to have I mean you should not always be bound by the routine. But that routine is important in learning self control.

So focus on one thing at a time, for now focus on doing 3day routine successfully or the other question (that are good questions) should wait for now.
 

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Today session:
It was an OK session.
First PONR: 23 mins
Second PONR: 32 mins
Third PONR: 43 mins
I noticed less tension in my whole and breathing also went well. I think it'll take me a week or two more to breath right subconsciously throughout the whole session. I also noticed I have more involuntary kegels than I first thought. They happen in quick succession when I am ballooning or playing very close to the PONR. I don't think I can do anything about it when they occur because I am very close to the PONR, but am hoping reverse kegel routine will take care of them. I didn't try to imagine wild things, just had something going on to test how I deal with those things.

I am not trying to over-think as I am advised not to, just observing and learning.
 

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Hey Guys, I have a story to tell!
First off, I took two days off from PE and Stamina exercises. I felt my unit was tired and I needed to get my mind off of it. I planned on edging day before yesterday, but my GF told me she wanna gonna come over for a day. She was here yesterday, so I didn't want to work my unit and took another day off. So me and my gf had sex 4th time and it was the best sex yet! She was very happy with my performance. We had the apartment to ourselves, so I decided to be a little creative. (I'd been reading up on a lot on articles online)
- We took a shower together and spent like 20 mins in there massaging, soaping and caressing each others bodies. (it went really good)
- She had been texting me how she wanted me to go down on her and spend some quality time down there. The video I got posting in relationship forum helped a great deal. I also read some other articles and watched some more videos. So I ate her out for about 23 mins, and she two orgasms. The second one was really intense because I was stimulating her clit ang g-spot simultaneously. It was all smiles on her face and she was really happy. For some reason, I was very confident (may be it was desperation) I explored her body like never before making sure no spot was left untouched. I kissed everything from her toe to head. I was able to keep my arousal level at 4-5 the whole time. I sort of didn't allow myself to get carried away and kept my calm. I was breathing right the whole time too.
- It was the first time she moaned that loud from cunnilingus. One time she went "right there baby...right there yea...yeaaa" I enjoyed myself down there and went with the flow.
-The penetration:-
We started out with doggy style. She likes her hair being pulled and getting her ass smacked. (I was more than happy to do that ;) ) I lasted 5 mins of continuous thrusting! (with may be two of three brief stops) I also banged her hard for 30-40 secs ( like real hard) and thats probably what pushed me to the PONR. I think I could have avoided it and didn't really try to hold it back for some reason. Then we kissed passionately for about 5 mins and I was ready to go again. I started pounding her doggy style again. I was really relaxed. Communication was also a key! She moaned and moaned. I tried to breath right as much as I could and my pelvic floor was not that tensed. I thought it was a lot more relaxed than it was first three times. I didn't cum the second time because she had to leave. I pounded her for 24-25 mins and I got on top of her for the last 12 or so mins. She enjoyed every moment of it. We both were kinda sad because she had to leave. But i really felt like a man last night! She gave me smiles like never before and all the moaning and talking was really satisfying and inspirational for me. I don't know when I'm gonna have sex next, but I wanna make sure I go over 10 mins before reaching my first PONR. I think I can do it. I need to relax my pelvic floor a bit more and keep edging/balloning regularly.

A question:
Can a MMO start thrusting again right after cumming?

Anyways, It was a really nice experience and I am happy. I'll keep working on my stamina. Thanks everybody who helped me with my questions and other stuff.
Cris.
 
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Steve23

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I haven't gotten to be able to MMO yet but from what I've read yeah, during MMO you will have an orgasm and you'll stay hard and I'm sure with practise you won't even have to stop thrusting at all.
 

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@Steve23
Is that right? You don't have to stop at all???. That sounds amazing, but it'd need a lot of practice. Um do you know if Pegasus or Minuteman are at that level? How long have you been practicing MMO?
 

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I've been doing PE and a kegel/reverse kegel routine for a while now but only started trying DO's maybe a month or so, and not religiously so not very good at them, but as I can remember Peg doesn't need to stop(unless he wants to during his DO) and pretty sure that's the point of MMO, thrust DO, maybe stop because or keep thrusting during the DO whatever the person likes best then continue.
 

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About a month or so ago we were discussing sexual techniques specifically the A spot (deep spot) amongst other stuff. I posted a link to a video showing you how to stimulate the A spot with your middle finger to give vaginal orgasms. You can find the link here. I think the video is on page 3 or 4 but you should read the whole thread there's some good info in it.

Oh and congrats on your success,:)
 
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@steve23 I get it now.
@imac Thanks for the links, i'll try them out next time. I got the deep spot video thing, but couldn't get the diagram. How far apart are the two deep spots? The one showed in the video in the front one, right?
 

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Cantona7

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Oh, so the only difference is you got to turn your finger around and stimulate it in the same fashion as you would with the front deep spot.
 

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Hey imac, these spots do exist, right? Because I see how a huge percentage of women don't have a "g-spot". I was trying so hard to find it last night with my gf, but the way they explain to stimulate did nothing more than normal fingering for her. So the reason I'm asking this because I want to find a spot/spots that is/are more sensitive then the rest of the vagina, so I can give her a good time and something different to normal fingering/masturbation she is used to.
 

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All women DO have a g spot it just that a lot of men think it's going to be a magic button and all they need to do is press it and their girl will start squirting. It doesn't work that way. The more aroused a woman is the more her g spot will engorge, and the more engorged it is the more sensitive it is to stimulation.

The g spot is naturally more sensitive in some women while others it just feels like normal stimulation, like in the case with your girlfriend.
That doesn't always have to be the case though. I've found that even with women that don't respond to g spot stimulation initially respond well to it after having a deep spot orgasm. Almost as if having a vaginal deep spot orgasm "activates" their g spot for want of a better word.

If anyone's going to try these techniques with their partner or any new techniques ( especially if shes never had a vaginal orgasm before ) do NOT tell her you’re going to give her an orgasm.
If you do you’ll put pressure and expectation on her to have one which will create resistance and and stop her from enjoying it let alone have an orgasm.
Her orgasm should be your secret weapon so I’ll say again do NOT tell her you’re going to make her cum from doing this or that to her unless you’ve already done it before because she will not believe you and if she doesn’t believe you’ll only create resistance.
Instead just tell her you heard of a new technique that’s supposed to feel really good and you want to try it out.

So to answer your question. Yes the deep spots do exist and they are by far the best way of giving a woman vaginal orgasms.