Achille's log

achillespenis

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I'm in need of support and advice. A lot of what I'm about to write I've never had the courage to tell anyone before. I've been reading through many of these post and finally feel like there are people out there that won't judge. I've always had insecurity issues with my penis starting from when I was a young kids with both size and other concerns.

For beginner, I'm uncut and I grew up in a part of the country were it seems that everyone my age was circumcised. As kid it was pointed out in front of a group of other guys that I was different. I had never seen another penis before then and thought all guys had a penises like mine. To my surprise and embarrassment no one else had extra skin. I also to embarrassed to ask anyone about it. It wasn't until I got to high school that found out about foreskin realized that I was just uncut. So, for years I had walked around thinking I had a deformed penis. This added knowledge helped me a little but I still felt like an outcast because I thought everyone else was cut. To make things worse for my ego, I also started watching porn in high school and of course all those guys are HUGE. I had avoided any situation where I had to be naked or in the presence other naked guys so I believed all guys were really that big and I was very small. This made me extremely self conscious and avoided sex and missed my chances with several women. It wasn't until years later when I looked up circumcision on the Internet that I found out the most of the world is not circumcised and even in this country that things are changing. I felt better, but there was still years of self doubt that I couldn't get rid of.

Fast forward a few years... I eventually got married and have been for now 4 years, I've still been self conscious about my size. My wife was my first, but I knew before we married she has had other other larger partners. I'm 5 in length and about 4.25 in girth; eventually I did find out that while I'm below average, but not extremely small. Our sex life was ok... or so I thought. The frequency had been decreasing over the years. I thought this was normal because of married life having a child, but now the sex has been almost not existent. We finally sat down talked about it and she came out and said that she didn't like having sex anymore because she just wasn't enjoying it. In the four years we had been married I had never given her an orgasm and that she wasn't sexually attracted to me. This made me feel as low as I had ever felt in my life. She went on to say that there was more to marriage than sex and that she loved me etc..., but all I could focus on was that she wasn't sexually attracted to me and that I had never been able please her. As a man, there's nothing that can break you faster than hearing that you can't please your own women. I agree with my wife that there is more to marriage than sex, but there also a need to be desired. So, here I am. I figure first of all I need to work on my sexual confidence and to do that I first need to be proud of my cock; that's were PE is going to come in. I know I'm an overall attractive guy, but my penis has always been my achilles heel.

I start to worry that if I can't please my wife that she'll eventually go looking for it elsewhere. I know there's other ways to please a women like going down on her, but she's just not into it... or maybe I'm not doing that right either. I going to stop writing for now, but it feels good to get this off my chest. Now I just need some advice and support.

Starting:
BPEL 5
Girth 4.25

I've been doing PE for about 2 weeks and have noticed some difference, but I'm waiting for the 1 month mark to measure again.
 
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PhibbysHammer

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Welcome to the Gym Achilles!!

First off, know that you are not the only guy to suffer these problems. Also you need to know that some women have trouble with sex and sexuality. The sexual problem may be with her and not at all with you. Did you two discuss counseling? The reason I ask is that I'm convinced your problems are not because of your size. Women become sexually aroused by a man for many reasons other than his dick. I encourage you to exersize your unit and make it large, healthy and strong, but you need to seperate that from getting closer to your wife. We're here for you and we all want you to succeeed in every way, so please feel free to make yourself at home and know you have support if you need it. Hope to hear more from you.
 

achillespenis

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Welcome to the Gym Achilles!!

First off, know that you are not the only guy to suffer these problems. Also you need to know that some women have trouble with sex and sexuality. The sexual problem may be with her and not at all with you. Did you two discuss counseling? The reason I ask is that I'm convinced your problems are not because of your size. Women become sexually aroused by a man for many reasons other than his dick. I encourage you to exersize your unit and make it large, healthy and strong, but you need to seperate that from getting closer to your wife. We're here for you and we all want you to succeeed in every way, so please feel free to make yourself at home and know you have support if you need it. Hope to hear more from you.

I've brought up counseling, but she's not interested. We're not sure how also counseling would help our sex life since the other aspects of our marriage are fine. I understand that having a larger unit isn't the key to solving our problem... it's more for my self confidence.

I appreciate your support.
 

tinytimisbig

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It takes a lot of guts to open up. I'm giving you a rep point.
 
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Pegasus

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Well we are here for you, I know it must have been hard to hear that. It is a big step to try and move forward, well done on that.
Geting a biger dick should help your esteem it might even help your sex life. Another thing that may help your sex life is increased skill, not saying you lack skill but we can all improve right? There is a wealth of info out there now on sex technique ,some of it on this forum.
Anyway good luck to you.