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Arousal Techniques

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  • Arousal Techniques

    There are so many factors that contribute to Premature Ejaculation that there is no one thing that will help everyone. There are some people who only need to balance their PC and BC muscles to control Pre-E but that is because it was that only factor that was causing it. We all do our kegals due to improper balance of the PC and BC muscule but somehow you may still suffer from Pre-E. I am convinced that OVER-AROUSAL is the missing link and is often overlooked but is just as important as kegal balance. So if you haven't balanced your kegals yet I recommend it. You can do this program while balancing your kegals too!


    If you have Pre-E due to over-arousal then you should have some if not all of the following problems.
    (That is right, arousal affects you physically AND mentally.)

    Mental:
    Little Confidence
    Uncontrollable, obsessive thoughts
    Excessive feelings of panic, fear, and uneasiness
    Repeated thoughts or flashbacks of traumatic experiences
    Find that you become overly stressed when about to engage in intercourse
    Lose of focus.
    Become in an almost primal trance state where you cannot concentrate on anything but the feeling of stimulation

    Physical:
    Holding your breath
    Tense up muscules around your body in reaction to stimulation. Primarily tension in the pelvis and legs
    Push a "hard" involuntary kegal when you touch your ferenium or other parts of your penis head
    A rapid heartbeat that never stops
    Increased blood pressure
    Intense sweating
    The "urge" to need to kegal



    Goals of these exercises:
    The focus on these exercises and the goal we are trying to reach with these exercises are:
    *To identify what symptoms your arousal causes
    *To reverse the symptoms by relaxing when you notice them. (even if this means temporarily suspending stimulation)

    To reduce subconcious stress levels
    Retrain your brain to not focus 100% on stimulation
    Teach you to relax and breathe properly in any situation
    Reduce stimulation from your most sensitive gland underneath the head of your penis
    Prevent your body from tensing up
    Identifying when you are in the primal trance state and getting out of it
    Be able to maintain arousal control in ANY situation from imagination to sex and everything in between
    Relieve the intensity of the symptoms of Over-Arousal and Premature Ejaculation



    NOTE:
    Most people only do one or two exercises to combat over-arousal but I feel you need to practice several things! The reason why I suggest so many variances is because I feel that you should attack arousal and your brain from many different angles to rewire it to change.

    I have learned from after doing these techniques for many months that ALL of my symptoms have vanished when edging. When I edge now my arousal symptoms are very small to non-existent. Because I have this arousal control I am able to last as long as I want. Arousal control gives you erection control because arousal guides your erection.


    AROUSAL TECHNIQUES 7 MONTH PROGRAM
    This program is to be followed in steps. Once you feel comfortable with the first step you can continue to the next step. By the end of this program you WILL have control over your over-arousal symptoms which will increase your stamina indefinitely. These are the exercises that have worked for me and I have pretty much done this whole program myself over the months.



    Here is a breakdown of how this program works. Along with each section is a time frame of about how long it should take to finish each section. Don't worry if you are competent in certain areas and are able to move on quicker. This is just an estimate.


    THE BEGINNING (UNDERSTAND YOUR AROUSAL) (1week - 3weeks)
    Step 1. Identify how your body reacts when aroused.

    THE BASIC STEPS (IMAGINATION AROUSAL ONLY) (2weeks - 4weeks)
    Step 2. Identify how to breathe correctly and learn a breathing technique that works for you to relax.
    Step 3. Apply correct breathing while edging to your imagination.
    Step 4. Ballooning to tolerate stimulation from the penis-head.
    Step 5. Identify when you are over-aroused and learn to "snap out of it."

    MASTERING AROUSAL (CEMENT THE TECHNIQUES YOU HAVE LEARNED) (4weeks - 5weeks)
    Step 6. Complete or get as far as you can through ByggD's arousal control program.

    THE ADVANCED STEPS (VISUAL/ AUDIO AROUSAL) (1weeks - 4weeks)
    Step 7. Read and understand why you are aroused to reading porn. No touching!
    Step 8. Watch and understand why you are aroused to watching porn. No touching!

    THE FINAL STEP (BECOME NATURAL) (2months - 4months)
    Step 9. Quit all pornographic stimulation.







    THE BEGINNING
    1.) Become Conscious of your Arousal.

    a)Learn what your body does to itself when you are aroused and write it down.
    (Look back up at those symptoms above and recognize at what part of the arousal and erection process they happen at. You may have symptoms that are not on the list so pay attention.)


    b)Learn what you body does when aroused in different situations:
    How does your arousal react when alone left with just your imagination?
    How does your arousal react when edging?
    How does your arousal react when watching porn?
    How does your arousal react when engaging in intercourse?

    (In each situation usually a person has different levels of arousal, depending on how aroused each situation makes him.)

    c)Learn your arousal scale. (The levels of the arousal process and how you feel at each level)

    d)Learn you erection scale. (The levels of the erection process and how your penis feels at each level)
    Arousal is not the same as your erection, so you cannot base your arousal level on how erect you are.

    The arousal and erection scales I have made are found in this thread: https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...ing-about.html
    READ the entire post! It explains in detail the relationship between the two. This is very important!








    ​THE BASIC STEPS
    Once you are comfortable and understand what what it is that you do when aroused you should begin the next arousal control techniques while focusing on stopping all of your symptoms while they are happening.

    Usually you can stop your symptoms by relaxing and pausing the exercise. But remember, if you haven't yet figured out what it is you do when your aroused, going any further will be pointless! I promise.

    With the set of basic steps you will not be trying to edge, balloon, or snap out of any stimulation but your mind!
    No visual or audial stimulation for now.





    2.) DEEP BREATHING
    Everyone knows the first thing to learn with relaxation is to learn how to breathe properly. I think a great example is how you breathe at rest while reading this or just relaxing. Notice how it is slow and most likely coming from the diaphram and not the chest. I personally practice only breathing regularly and it worked perfectly for me!

    Feel free to try any of the other deep breathing techniques you may have read already but learn something and stick with it.

    HINT: Improper breathing includes: Holding your breathe for long periods. Breathing with the chest. Shallow breathing.





    3.) DEEP BREATHING WHILE EDGING
    Take your deep breathing exercising to the next level. Utilize it in your edging sessions. You can learn how to breathe properly all you want but when your in the moment it is going to be harder than you think to breathe right!


    Edge for as long as you can but work your way up to at least 20min making sure you are breathing deep the ENTIRE time. This may sound silly but it works!

    Get to 20min of edging to your imagination only. No stimuli at ALL!
    This may be hard if you have porn-induced ED. It may take 1-4 weeks to be able to edge with just your imagination, but you need to stick it out before continuing. This is part of the program and vital for the next steps.

    Begin deep breathing right before or at the moment you start, before you get an erection. This helps by keeping your arousal lower (around a 4) the entire time, rather than having a high arousal and have to bring it down right away. It is much easier to maintain that way! Don't worry if you have a hard time, it WILL come with practice!

    Practicing breathing during edging does multiple things from what I have experienced.
    1.It trains you not to concentrate on the stimulation at 100% subconsciously
    2.It will also subconsciously train you how to breathe normally during sex or masturbation
    3.It will help keep you from holding your breathe while stimulated
    4.Manages Anxiety and heart rate as well as other physical symptoms, if your arousal never goes up to an 8 you will never get these symptoms.


    You may choose whether or not to use lube for edging, but lube personally has worked well for me!

    HINT:
    During edging I suggest putting up a post-it with the words "Breathe Properly". Focus on these words while edging and you will be able to remember within a few weeks on your own. The goal is to memorize to breathe the entire time!






    4.) BALLOONING TO REDUCE STIMULATION

    This is similar to Balooning but mentally different as you should be focusing on different things.
    You do this while your erect. Put one finger pressing down on the spot below your balls but before your butt hole where you can feel a kegal when you do one. This is the ferinium.


    If you rub the underside of your penis head with the other hand you will feel an involuntary kegal.
    You will notice that rubbing the underside of your penis head in a spinning motion feels really good and creates a lot of stimulation and gives an involuntary kegal.

    Now slow down the circular rubbing to a pace that doesn't give you the involuntary kegal anymore.
    You are now rubbing the most sensitive part of your penis and not receiving an involuntary kegal.

    Repeatedly try to get at a faster pace of circular rubbing over the weeks of doing it and you should notice that you can take more thrust without so much stimulation.
    Remember to relax and breathe deeply while doing this! We are building on the first three steps!





    5.) SNAP OUT OF IT

    You now should have a decent understanding of your arousal symptoms right? You may have noticed then that sometimes you get in the mood where you get so wrapped up in your horny thoughts that you get in this intense aroused state of mind without even knowing it.

    If you could just "snap out of it" and talking about in your head what is going on at the moment you can get out of this intense aroused state with practice.


    If you can do this "successfully" your arousal will drop and stay at the perfect level. I say "successfully" because you can tell overtime mentally when it works and when it doesn't. Sometimes I have to try multiple times but it really works once you can figure it out.

    A member of the forum came up with this recently and it is working well for him... You can also "snap out of it" by vocally pronouncing a phrase to stimulate an arousal decrease. An example of this could be saying out-loud, "I need to drop my arousal from an 8 to a 6". This may actually be an easier way to "snap out of it" than just using a thought, as using your voice could be a greater distraction to your brain towards the arousal.





    MASTERING AROUSAL
    Now you should be able to identify and combat your over-arousal symptoms when edging to your imagination.




    6.) ByggD's Program

    You already know that is much harder to control your arousal for any type of visual or audio stimulation. If you haven't done so already I suggest that now you try to complete:

    https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...-response.html

    You may be asking, why is he saying "try" to complete it? This is because I myself couldn't finish the program because I couldn't even last 10 seconds when edging to porn in the last week, even though I did great for the rest of the program. It was impossible for me at the time! So don't worry if you can't finish it.

    This is an amazing program that completely revolutionized the way I thought and take on controlling arousal.
    It will make you take everything you have learned so far in this post and cement it in your head! Even to this day I sometimes edge to the way he says, very slowly taking 2 seconds per stroke. It WORKS! Take advantage of this program guys!



    Once you have completed ByggD's program, congrats! You may move on to the advanced and most important steps in reversing over-arousal.







    THE ADVANCED STEPS
    Now you should have your arousal in great control and know how to reverse it when your arousal symptoms strike!
    Now it is time to add visual and audio stimulation.






    Step 7. Read and Understand Stimulation

    If you abused porn your mind is wired to take visual stimulation and go directly to a strong erection. If you quickly masturbated to porn a lot you body has no choice but to do what you trained it to do, get very erect, very quick, to visual stimulation. Like the title says you are going to read stimulation and understand why it makes you over-aroused. You are going to "think" about "how you think" essentially.

    How do you read stimulation? Essentially all it is is reading porn. Find a site to use for this step. I always used
    http://literotica.com Scroll down to stories and pics. Then scroll down to Erotic Stories and pick your category.

    Now for the exercise. Read these erotic stories in increments of 5min. Remember staying relaxed and breathing correctly will help prevent your body from getting over-aroused. Time yourself with a stopwatch or something. After the 5min is up record how you did. Was it easy to control your arousal or hard? Did you get an erection or were you able resist it? You should feel the urge to kegal when trying to hold back your erection. Just do your best.

    There is NO TOUCHING yourself at all! All you are doing is reading and relaxing.
    Do this exercise 10 times. (Just 1 session on any given day)
    You do not have to "master" this exercise so to say. It is just preparing you for the next step.

    HINT:
    Try starting with stories that you think would be easier to handle. Then if you want move on to more stories that are into the things you like. Just remember, there is no point in reading things that are unreal or too much of a fantasy to help you overcome sex. Pick stories that are similar to normal experiences men go through.
    This step may cause mild ED.




    Step 8: Watch and Understand Stimulation

    Like the title says you are going to watch porn and understand why it makes you over-aroused. You are going to "think" about "how you think" essentially, again, but this time it will be a bit more intense. Do not be scared of porn. If you use it for learning and not for enjoyment it shouldn't negatively effect you.

    You need to watch amateur porn, as it is close to the real thing and generally isn't full of fake actors and fake scenes. It is the closest situation to what you are dealing with in real life. Remember this isn't about satisfying your arousal, it is about learning what it is porn does to your body and reversing your arousal symptoms by relaxing and breathing correctly.

    Now for the exercise. Watch the amateur porn in increments of 5min. Remember staying relaxed and breathing correctly will help prevent your body from getting over-aroused. Time yourself with a stopwatch or something. After the 5min is up record how you did. Was it easy to control your arousal or hard? Did you get an erection or were you able resist it? You should feel the urge to kegal when trying to hold back your erection. Just do your best.

    There is NO TOUCHING yourself at all! All you are doing is watching and relaxing.
    Do this exercise 10 times. (Just 1 session on any given day)

    HINT: I have a LOT of information on the "urge to kegal" as well as my personal example of what I did for this phase of the arousal techniques! https://www.pegym.com/forums/prematu...e-kegal-2.html READ the whole thing!

    This step may cause mild ED.



    THE FINAL STEP

    Quit all porn. This includes any kind of material that causes sexual arousal besides a human being.
    Any symptoms of ED that occurred during the advanced steps will be removed within the first few weeks. Over the next few months your over-arousal will start to reverse, and confidence will begin to rise.
    I recommend quitting porn for 4 months full complete potential results. But if you must, sustain for a minimum of 2 month for minimum potential results. Evaluate your stamina after this step and if your stamina is increasing (Which it most likely will) continue to be porn-free. If after 3 months your stamina is still crap, consult me.

    Quitting porn has many benefits! I will list them at another time, but for now you'll have to trust me. I am 5 months porn-free. I have heard from a few of the members on here that being porn-free is helping to reduce over-arousal symptoms. I believe this is mainly because the infrequency of over-arousal by porn drops your body's response to extreme-arousal overtime.




    My stamina after finishing this program is incredible now! I have sex as long as I want and nothing can beat this feeling.
    I know anyone has the potential to rid themselves of Pre-E.
    Drummer19
    Senior Member
    Last edited by Drummer19; 01-09-2013, 03:15 PM.
    Arousal Techniques-Techniques to overcome Pre-E.

  • #2
    Excellent post. Repped.

    Big thumbs up on point 1, whatever flavour of PE a man might suffer, this is always going to help. I might even go so far as to say you need to do this first. Self-awareness is so important, and more to the point without it, it's going to be so much harder to recognise when you really are improving, if even possible.

    4 is a really nice exercise, and the first time I think I've seen that suggested. I like that a lot.

    One more thing that I think helps, especially duo, is possibly related to point 4 about being "in the zone" and partly about shifting mental focus if not something slightly different altogether is to open your eyes.
    "I want to go to my death bed one day knowing that even when my heart led me into the fire, I fucking did it anyway, and I have the story to tell."

    Everything I know about Premature Ejaculation

    Your dick is almost certainly big enough. Relax

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks Spanky! Very much appreciated from you! If we can come up with more exercises or improvements I will update this thread.
      Arousal Techniques-Techniques to overcome Pre-E.

      Comment


      • #4
        A master work Drummer.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Drummer19 View Post
          Thanks Spanky! Very much appreciated from you! If we can come up with more exercises or improvements I will update this thread.
          You're welcome, it's great work. Just thinking about exercises, I think a lot of what we're trying to do with the psych is to train automatic responses, like pe_zen's competing response method for involutaries, where the desired result (relaxation) is brought on through action (RK) to stimulus (involuntary) so often that after a time, the action isn't needed for the body to go straight to the result - in this case, relaxation. I think your ballooning exercise is doing the same thing. More gently than pe_zen, but likely more reliably. It seems hard to imagine that the unconscious brain would be as malleable as that, but it really is.

          Edit: just re-read. This really is a great post.
          "I want to go to my death bed one day knowing that even when my heart led me into the fire, I fucking did it anyway, and I have the story to tell."

          Everything I know about Premature Ejaculation

          Your dick is almost certainly big enough. Relax

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by spanky View Post
            You're welcome, it's great work. Just thinking about exercises, I think a lot of what we're trying to do with the psych is to train automatic responses, like pe_zen's competing response method for involutaries, where the desired result (relaxation) is brought on through action (RK) to stimulus (involuntary) so often that after a time, the action isn't needed for the body to go straight to the result - in this case, relaxation. I think your ballooning exercise is doing the same thing. More gently than pe_zen, but likely more reliably. It seems hard to imagine that the unconscious brain would be as malleable as that, but it really is.

            Edit: just re-read. This really is a great post.
            If there is anything I have learned over the months it is that you can rewire your involuntary acts just about any way you want to. I think that's why I state for an individual
            to learn what happens to them personally when they are aroused, as they can have there own individual responses that they have learned involuntary. I think the greatest thing about involuntary training is just that, you can train yourself to have beneficial involuntary responses during sex. And with sex of course you want to spend your time enjying yourself, not spent wondering if you are remembering every trick to attempt to relax more.
            Arousal Techniques-Techniques to overcome Pre-E.

            Comment


            • #7
              Nice post, it informs about arousal in very good way.

              Sensual distraction and accepting the arousal should be the next level or so to say.

              Sensual distraction boils down to being able to feel all of your body during everyday, arousal and high arousal states and learn how to focus on your parts of body. While focusing on them you are actually moving the pressure form the pelvic floor and in a way "moving the sexual energy" or in more logical words paying more attention to the sensations on the paticular part of the body or the body as a whole.

              The easy example is this, when you flex your abs you are paying your attention to them also, try to keep the abs flexed (or your arm muscle) but turn your attention to some other parts of your body (like a toe on your foot) or some outside distraction, you will notice that the flexing is getting weaker and weaker since your attention is somewhere else. The difference is that the attention to the pelvic floor area sensations and flexes is one of the more stronger sensations so a pretty good time practiceing and focusing must be invested (but this deppends on a person also) until some of the imporvements can be seen.

              Also focusing on the sensations such as your touches (with hands, lips, body) on her body, or her touches on your body greatly help learning this. Because the more your body accepts her as something that is close to yourself your solo edging will pay more off since you will perceve her less and less as a foreign object and more as something that is in a way a extension of yourself.

              Accepting the arousal ties in with the sensual distraction but when you just put in on a whole body level. Arousal and tension are most of the time pretty connected even if they are different.

              Sometimes it helps so much just being aware of the things like this, that is why many methods and stuff here on this forum is benefitial even when one is not activelly doing them, because he is aware of them so the wail of mistery and panic (anxiety) made by not understanding yourself lowers since the better you can explain to yourself what is happening and the more you have something concrete to rely upon you become more relaxed.

              Because rather than like before you ejcaulte and just wonder "just what the heck happen, and why so fast" now you actually can dissect that big mess to a fine peaces and processes and you can better find and localise even more just what the heck makes it so problematic. So even if you premature ejaculate again you are actaully gaining knowledge about yourself instead just feeling pissed of and wondering why.

              And another thing that really helps is when you start to understand that having all those sensations can be use to an adventage for having a more intense sex life just because you are simply feeling more and can get more out of it (this expecially echoes in the MMO and DO compartment).


              All in all excelent topic and post.
              premE FAQ

              Comment


              • #8
                Fantastic post drummer, look forward to trying these techniques out! (Great follow up by MinuteMan!)

                Comment


                • #9
                  Well, I just realized that all the PE symptoms mentioned apply in my case. I'm particularly prone to holding my breath.

                  Maybe I should start keeping an exercise diary...

                  Thank you for the outstanding thread, that goes for every one of you.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by weakling View Post
                    Well, I just realized that all the PE symptoms mentioned apply in my case. I'm particularly prone to holding my breath.

                    Maybe I should start keeping an exercise diary...

                    Thank you for the outstanding thread, that goes for every one of you.

                    I have a diary also that I have been keeping up with since November of last year. It includes a detailed summary of everything I was learning every two weeks and shows about how long it took for me to see results. Mabey this reading this(Diary of Pre Ejactulation ) can help encourage you to start a diary.
                    Arousal Techniques-Techniques to overcome Pre-E.

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                    • #11
                      Great post drummer. I am great at ballooniong now because our chat about 5 days ago. Btw... have you checked to see if you have a sweet spot at your penis hole/tip? If you just rub your tip up against the palm of your hand you might feel something pretty intense like me. Btw....Is there a "normal breathing machine" i can hook myself up to during sex? haha!
                      Started MAY 2011 BPEL 5 and a 1/2 inches. EG 5 and a 1/2 inches.
                      Now MAY 2012 BPEL 6 and a 1/2 inches. EG 5 and a 1/2 inches.
                      I have cured myself of prem ejac, now I am working on a bigger shlong.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Good stuff!! And obviously can aide those that don't have PrE issues to be able to last even longer.
                        Old Gym Log - Tracking progress with the iLogPE App
                        "Wherever you go, there you are. Stay sexy, my friends."

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                        • #13
                          Most of what we talk of here could be usefull to guys without pre e issues,

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by JamesMonroe View Post
                            Great post drummer. I am great at ballooniong now because our chat about 5 days ago. Btw... have you checked to see if you have a sweet spot at your penis hole/tip? If you just rub your tip up against the palm of your hand you might feel something pretty intense like me. Btw....Is there a "normal breathing machine" i can hook myself up to during sex? haha!
                            I remember in the past it was also a sweet spot for me. I forgot about it until you mentioned it the other day. So I tried it and it has a minimal stimulation for me but doesn't cause an involuntary kegal anymore like it used to. It is weird, but I guess this is a good thing!
                            Arousal Techniques-Techniques to overcome Pre-E.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Drummer19 View Post
                              I remember in the past it was also a sweet spot for me. I forgot about it until you mentioned it the other day. So I tried it and it has a minimal stimulation for me but doesn't cause an involuntary kegal anymore like it used to. It is weird, but I guess this is a good thing!
                              Awesome! So would u say that your ballooning has helped against sensitivity for sure? I remember a guy telling me a long time ago that "rubbing the penis head" helps to desensitize. Tell you the truth... I don't pop as many unwanted boners as I used to since I started ballooning how u told me to. It might be also that I stopped watching porn. Maybe a mixture of both. Either way, thank you!!!

                              Btw... do you also not ejaculate at the end most of the time like me? I really think that is a GREAT training strategy. I'm trying to only do it once a week. I also wonder is Jelqing helps with prem ejac in any way cuz I started doing that too.
                              JamesMonroe
                              Senior Member
                              Last edited by JamesMonroe; 06-21-2011, 01:14 AM.
                              Started MAY 2011 BPEL 5 and a 1/2 inches. EG 5 and a 1/2 inches.
                              Now MAY 2012 BPEL 6 and a 1/2 inches. EG 5 and a 1/2 inches.
                              I have cured myself of prem ejac, now I am working on a bigger shlong.

                              Comment

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