Help in Motivating Overweight Husband

Star316

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After 7+ years going on and off the gym I can tell you one thing- if the motivation isn't coming from within, you won't do sh*t.

Oh yeah this is true, so much of my friends dropped the ball on getting healthy just because their friends who pushed them to workout, stopped. Then they suddenly had no reason to get fit. Since you know your husband the best, try to motivate him to get healthy for both of your sakes especially for himself. I myself took a good hard look in the mirror and I didn't like what I see. I had a BMI of BIG FAT YELLOW RICE BALL (please laugh, I've actually been called that :p).

From experience, I would like to point out dieting is not what it seems based on general consensus. It's not about eating less or starving yourself to lose weight. It's more about eating healthy as well as eating stuff in moderation. Except for fruits and veggies, you can go all out in that. Giving up or changing your eating habits is very tough if you have random cravings like me. It's better to ease it in.

But with all the great advices from this thread, the only way we can help him is just showing him the way. Remember, he must take the first step by himself!
 

TPW

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On behalf of this reader, I just wanted to thank you all for your input and opinions. :thanks::)
 

longerlastingnoob

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I'll add that I never liked working out til I started watching vids on youtbe ( and later others) about bodybuilding, fitness, science behind it and inspirational vids, Terminator has a good inspirational speech. Then started liking pushing myself, working on form, stepping up the volume etc.
 

WalkThePlank

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Hubby needs to be told the honest truth. You're much hotter than him now, and you're going to be banging someone who is your approximate equal. That can be him, or it can be someone else, ball is really in his court.

BS about "health" and such is pure nonsense. A fat person has roughly the same life expectancy as a slim person. Only the obese are at serious health risk.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a spouse who looks as good as you do. Pretending otherwise is a disservice to both of you.
 

burtybasset

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Hubby needs to be told the honest truth. You're much hotter than him now, and you're going to be banging someone who is your approximate equal. That can be him, or it can be someone else, ball is really in his court.

BS about "health" and such is pure nonsense. A fat person has roughly the same life expectancy as a slim person. Only the obese are at serious health risk.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a spouse who looks as good as you do. Pretending otherwise is a disservice to both of you.

Cool avatar WalkThePlank, but that doesn't seem all that helpful, if she was wanting to "bang someone hotter", I don't think she would be seeking advice to help her husband.

Being overweight increases your risks of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, cancers, the list goes on, it's a little unfair to question someones motives for helping someone when they are not here to defend themselves.
 

WalkThePlank

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Cool avatar WalkThePlank, but that doesn't seem all that helpful, if she was wanting to "bang someone hotter", I don't think she would be seeking advice to help her husband.

Being overweight increases your risks of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, cancers, the list goes on, it's a little unfair to question someones motives for helping someone when they are not here to defend themselves.
Thanks :)

It's not complicated. She's saying "I am giving you a little time, fix this or else".
It's very naive to think any woman is cool with being married to a fat guy if she isn't fat.
She needs to communicate this with him, so he gets this.

And no, being 40 lbs overweight doesn't raise your risk of anything by any significant margin. Life expediency for someone with a BMI of 30 is about 1 year MORE than a BMI of 20. Only when you clear 35 does it become a health risk. It's only the 40+(massive people, over 300 lbs) that can lose a decade or more.
 
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MrB8

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Please let us stay constructive, on topic and discuss ways to help the lady motivate her husband to take better care of himself, no need to veer off-topic.

Healthy is good, self improvement is good, helping one another is good! :D
 

Jay1983

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My GF tells me no sucky sucky if I eat another double quarter pounder with cheese.
 

Kent09

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it is really a lot about the diet.
a bag of chips (350g) is equal to 1800 calories.
1800 calories if you eat carrots only is 5.4kg (watch out so you do not get too much fiber though), 1800 calories if you eat chicken only (the ones that are low on fat) is 1.8kg food.
i think 1800 calories a day is what is required for a 100kg or 220lbs man to be dropping 2lbs a week without exercise.
2400-2500calories is what is required to maintain the weight without exercise.
add in exercise and he will be dropping way faster and can eat way more calories.
 

havenots

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thenewdude

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Cool avatar WalkThePlank, but that doesn't seem all that helpful, if she was wanting to "bang someone hotter", I don't think she would be seeking advice to help her husband.

Being overweight increases your risks of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, cancers, the list goes on, it's a little unfair to question someones motives for helping someone when they are not here to defend themselves.

I agree that talking about banging someone else is just plain vain and inconvenient to be polite. I hear more about one taking about what they are doing or not doing then but her motivating her husband to get in shape as she is doing. To her I give props and to him, I still hope the best. This is not about us but about them.
 

Sean Jacobs

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I did not read all the responses to this thread, so if I'm repeating anything I apologize.

Here is my advice. I was once told by a woman that there are 2 things that will definitely motivate a man: Sex and Food. Obviously you don't want to offer him food to help him get back into shape. So, why not do this.

Sit down and have a discussion with him about both of them (woman and man) getting back into shape. Express to him that you want him to be healthy for many years to come so they can have a wonderfully enjoyable life (be active into old age, be around for the grand kids, be the sexy older couple, etc). Now, here is the hook. Tell him that you want to make this as fun as possible for him. Tell him that for every "x" pounds (what ever works 3, 4 or 5) he loses (from his starting weight) she will give him a great BJ, or ride him hard, or will dress up as a Catholic school girl (what ever thing he enjoys). Also, once he hits the final goal she will something extra special (fulfill one of his top fantasies). Now to get him to maintain once he's hit the goal she will have to keep complementing him about his physique, with a flirty sexual tone...especially during any sexual activity.

This should keep the guy motivated to say in shape.
 

Bigdaddy55

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If other guys are nothing you, go some where it will be obvious that other men look so he gets the idea. Mention how some guys flirt with you at the gym or in line for coffee. Some thing that might scare him a little.
 

DreamOn

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I can give you all the advice and tips that I know about losing weight but at the end of the day it all depends on him. It has to be intrinsic but in order for it to be intrinsic perhaps something has to give or perhaps some kind of inspiration, but I don't know the husband personally so it's something the wife has to figure out. I certainly wouldn't suggest something out of assumption about their life or his life as I don't know the husband at all.